《《混世魔王程咬金》第89回》歌词

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[00:00:00] 尉迟恭装病支走了程咬金

[00:00:04] 他以为没事儿了

[00:00:07] 晚饭过后

[00:00:09] 两位夫人去照看孩子

[00:00:11] 她恋夜工

[00:00:13] 你别看他回宝林装三年了

[00:00:18] 每天都练功啊

[00:00:20] 怕把武艺扔下

[00:00:23] 练功以毕洗洗涮涮坐那儿喝茶

[00:00:26] 准备安歇

[00:00:29] 就在这首庄子的小头目蹬蹬蹬蹬跑到里边报启禀宫爷大事不好

[00:00:37] 外边来了一帮怪物

[00:00:40] 个个儿脸分五色

[00:00:42] 举着火把生成要钱

[00:00:45] 我们两位夫人

[00:00:47] 尉迟恭本来性如烈火

[00:00:50] 听这话直气得怒发冲冠

[00:00:54] 啪把手中谁碗一摔蹭的站起来

[00:00:58] 什么人胆大包天

[00:01:00] 竟敢如此无礼

[00:01:01] 哎呀

[00:01:02] 给爷被马开枪

[00:01:06] 有人答应一声

[00:01:07] 他蹭蹭蹭就出来了

[00:01:09] 也是巧了

[00:01:11] 黑白二位夫人没在这儿要载着讷

[00:01:15] 不能让他走埃

[00:01:17] 没人拦着他出来拦在了外边

[00:01:20] 上马清抢出了府门

[00:01:24] 有人领着来到了窗口一看外边儿

[00:01:28] 有人不好强啊

[00:01:30] 抓呀在喊呢

[00:01:34] 尉迟恭气坏了

[00:01:36] 干嘛来到了村口

[00:01:39] 来人

[00:01:40] 把庄门给我打开

[00:01:42] 有人把装门吱呀呀打开

[00:01:46] 他催马来到装外胎

[00:01:49] 胆大毛贼吃了熊心吞了豹子胆

[00:01:52] 竟敢在你家公爷庄子上搅闹觉

[00:01:56] 你们山大王过来收词

[00:02:00] 那些举火把的花往旁边一闪

[00:02:04] 就在这一阵儿听有人喊嘿

[00:02:06] 老嘿

[00:02:08] 我来了

[00:02:10] 嗯

[00:02:11] 声音这么熟呢

[00:02:12] 尉迟恭举目一看就看来了一匹战马

[00:02:16] 这匹马头至尾长友站自提职位高有九尺或挺大家肚子红段子马毛

[00:02:25] 上面有斑斑点点

[00:02:26] 马上坐着

[00:02:27] 一个人是蓝靛壳

[00:02:29] 大眼珠子搭框

[00:02:30] 外髁下一部红胡须长钟情者八卦

[00:02:35] 开山斧不是别人

[00:02:37] 正是程咬金

[00:02:39] 尉迟敬德一看吓坏了

[00:02:42] 是拨马就跑

[00:02:44] 程咬金喊上了

[00:02:46] 老黑

[00:02:47] 好小子

[00:02:49] 你这四哥

[00:02:50] 我都给蒙了

[00:02:51] 我看你往哪里跑

[00:02:54] 尉迟恭想

[00:02:55] 我上当了

[00:02:56] 哎呀

[00:02:57] 我往哪跑

[00:02:59] 经得别跑

[00:03:01] 你再跑也装不了病了

[00:03:03] 你给我站住

[00:03:07] 尉迟恭一想

[00:03:08] 对呀

[00:03:09] 他已经知道我没病

[00:03:11] 我往哪躲呀

[00:03:12] 晕

[00:03:14] 带住马扔掉龟背驼龙枪翻身下马几步就来到了

[00:03:22] 程咬金近前

[00:03:24] 哥哥

[00:03:26] 我就给你石林啦

[00:03:28] 程咬金赶紧带出坐骑

[00:03:30] Aa 老黑呀

[00:03:33] 你敢蒙我说着水等下马莲儿手拉手网庄子里去

[00:03:41] 尉迟恭看了看举火把亮子油松的人都脸分五色

[00:03:46] 四哥呀

[00:03:47] 你哪里这么多怪物啊

[00:03:50] 哈哈

[00:03:51] 怕了吧

[00:03:53] 他就把自己怎么回到县衙

[00:03:55] 看出竞得装病的破绽如何向县官结冰

[00:04:00] 又让军卒的脸上涂上颜色前来诈装的事儿说了一遍

[00:04:07] 经得听完

[00:04:08] 暗暗佩服程咬金的智谋啊

[00:04:12] 四哥

[00:04:13] 真有你的老黑啊

[00:04:15] 要是没有我

[00:04:16] 我这趟山西可就白来了

[00:04:18] 你不对呀

[00:04:20] 呃

[00:04:20] 四哥

[00:04:21] 我不是冲你

[00:04:22] 害我知道弟兄二人手挽手说说笑笑

[00:04:27] 往庄子里走

[00:04:29] 他们的枪客斧子

[00:04:30] 有人使着把马牵着劲装

[00:04:34] 那些脸上涂了颜色的冰冰也到庄子里打水洗

[00:04:40] 径自有人招待

[00:04:42] 再说

[00:04:43] 程咬金和敬德进了庄子直奔国公府

[00:04:47] 来到了府里头网厅前一看黑白

[00:04:52] 二是正在那儿等着净得呢

[00:04:56] 刚才有人去报信

[00:04:58] 说是村子外边来了山大王绕强夫人俩人就知道不好

[00:05:05] 扔下孩子赶紧到前边

[00:05:08] 已经晚了

[00:05:09] 程咬金已经进来了

[00:05:11] 家长不好意思了

[00:05:13] 你看我我看你这脸都红了

[00:05:16] 白素华的白脸发红黑树莓的黑脸都紫了啊

[00:05:22] 四哥啊

[00:05:23] 你好好

[00:05:24] 哈哈

[00:05:25] 我差点儿叫你们糊弄了

[00:05:28] 四哥你可别生气呀

[00:05:31] 我生什么气

[00:05:32] 快快准备酒菜

[00:05:34] 我和兄弟好好喝一喝

[00:05:38] 就这样

[00:05:39] 有人准备好酒菜

[00:05:41] 歌俩对坐

[00:05:44] 内姐俩一旁陪着针灸

[00:05:47] 经得问四哥

[00:05:50] 我听你弟妹说

[00:05:52] 苏烈

[00:05:53] 苏定方领兵犯劲万岁

[00:05:56] 以下圣旨叫二哥为元帅

[00:05:59] 徐三哥为军师

[00:06:02] 那你上我这干啥呀

[00:06:04] 嗨

[00:06:05] 老怀孕

[00:06:07] 秦二哥为帅

[00:06:08] 徐三哥为军师

[00:06:10] 这都没说的

[00:06:12] 可就是我当先锋不称职啊

[00:06:16] 不瞒兄弟

[00:06:17] 你说呀

[00:06:18] 这要在前几年不算什么

[00:06:21] 别说当先锋啊皇上

[00:06:25] 也当过两天

[00:06:27] 不是四哥跟你吹

[00:06:28] 敢说我斧子天下没人敢惹你记得太原城下吗

[00:06:35] 那宋金刚的吗

[00:06:36] 是我用斧子抹地站洛阳

[00:06:40] 你喝马童还打了半天也没把他怎么样

[00:06:44] 我一出去就把他给劈了

[00:06:47] 此刻没说瞎话吗

[00:06:50] 没有没有

[00:06:51] 是啊

[00:06:52] 现在不比那个这儿咯

[00:06:55] 我上了几岁年纪

[00:06:56] 我比你大呀

[00:06:58] 手脚也迟缓

[00:07:00] 当了几年国公把斧子朝都亡了

[00:07:04] 你看这肚子这么大能上阵吗

[00:07:07] 要紧的事

[00:07:08] 我这名声一大就传得远

[00:07:12] 谁都知道我程咬金会三斧子半

[00:07:16] 都知道

[00:07:17] 用着就不灵了

[00:07:20] 谁说的

[00:07:20] 三哥你五招呢

[00:07:22] 嗨哎

[00:07:23] 别提那两招了

[00:07:24] 那蒙是大吉

[00:07:26] 我活这么大岁数要叫人家给宰了

[00:07:29] 不上算呢

[00:07:31] 我想大唐朝勇冠三军

[00:07:34] 敌军闻风丧胆的人物是谁啊

[00:07:38] 苏烈怕谁

[00:07:39] 马三宝段攻击

[00:07:42] 差远了

[00:07:44] 要说能征惯战的

[00:07:46] 还得说是老黑你呀

[00:07:49] 于是我今天动稳保奏

[00:07:52] 你为前部正印先锋官前去扫北万岁下了一道只因命

[00:07:58] 我到山西班

[00:08:01] 请你回长安

[00:08:03] 我一想

[00:08:04] 就凭咱俩那份交情你这大没还是我保的呢你能不去吗

[00:08:10] 我恨不得一步来到你这堡林庄借了你叙叙弟兄离别之情

[00:08:17] 我来后aa 你装病蒙我

[00:08:21] 害得我装鬼闹神骗了你了

[00:08:25] 嘿

[00:08:26] 你想想

[00:08:27] 你对得起四哥骂a 静得听啦

[00:08:32] 也觉得不好意思

[00:08:34] 他斟满了一碗酒

[00:08:35] 站起来递给程咬金

[00:08:38] 四哥

[00:08:39] 你这一说

[00:08:40] 我真觉得对不起

[00:08:41] 你我光顾了

[00:08:43] 怕万岁

[00:08:44] 报复我

[00:08:45] 把你这茬给王乐

[00:08:47] 呃

[00:08:47] 我这儿给您赔礼道歉了

[00:08:50] 不过

[00:08:52] 我还是不能去啊

[00:08:54] 你两个弟妹都有孩子

[00:08:56] 我离不开家呀

[00:08:58] 哎

[00:08:58] 老黑

[00:08:59] 你给我住口谈

[00:09:02] 其链子可不对

[00:09:03] 谁没儿女啊

[00:09:05] 我老成了俩儿子

[00:09:07] 一个叫程铁牛

[00:09:09] 一个叫程万牛茂茂腾腾的

[00:09:12] 正淘气的时候

[00:09:15] 我被他舍了

[00:09:16] 骂大丈夫可不能够因为妻子亡了国家

[00:09:22] 他也不是这个龙吴N

[00:09:25] 我怕皇上

[00:09:27] 哎哎

[00:09:29] 这几年我一直陪王伴驾

[00:09:31] 我观察当今贞观天子还不错

[00:09:35] 对咱们一如既往就不容易啦

[00:09:41] 黑白二是也说

[00:09:43] 既然四哥叫你去

[00:09:45] 怎么着

[00:09:46] 你得给个面子

[00:09:47] 你就去吧

[00:09:49] 嗯

[00:09:49] 我走能行吗

[00:09:51] 行

[00:09:52] 那好

[00:09:53] 那明天我可就跟四哥回长安啦

[00:09:56] 去吧

[00:09:57] 程咬金这才把九节过来

[00:09:59] 杨博顿顿顿喝下去

[00:10:03] 用手拍了拍竞得的肩膀

[00:10:06] 兄弟这么做就对了

[00:10:09] 还别说

[00:10:10] 当今万岁

[00:10:11] 是有道明君不会为二间王记恨你

[00:10:16] 就算他记恨也没有什么可怕的

[00:10:20] 有我he

[00:10:21] 秦二哥

[00:10:23] 徐三哥

[00:10:24] 谁也不能把你怎么地

[00:10:26] 大不了闹个he 瓦

[00:10:29] 冈山离密那样来个瓦缸散将

[00:10:33] 兄弟你就放心跟我走吧

[00:10:37] 黑白二室

[00:10:38] 一听忙问

[00:10:39] 哎呀四哥

[00:10:41] 你说到这我想起点儿事儿

[00:10:43] 那瓦刚山后来怎么样了

[00:10:45] 嗨

[00:10:46] 别提了

[00:10:47] 自从瓦刚山伞降之后

[00:10:50] 剩下李密和王伯当

[00:10:53] 他们俩合计合计也没劲了

[00:10:55] 就投大唐来了

[00:10:57] 临走的时候

[00:10:59] 李密还带折死鬼

[00:11:01] 杨广的妃子萧后

[00:11:04] 王伯党不让李密说

[00:11:07] 你先叫我带着

[00:11:08] 我有用

[00:11:09] 他们在过潼关的时候正式建成元吉二间王在那儿镇守

[00:11:16] 他们拿肖飞做敲门砖

[00:11:19] 把这女人给他俩了

[00:11:20] 然后李密和王柏党进京了

[00:11:23] 进京没敢找当时的天子

[00:11:27] 他们找到承秦王李道宗

[00:11:30] 李道宗呢

[00:11:31] 还真就把他们俩留下了

[00:11:33] 留下可留下美感

[00:11:36] 保举他们当官

[00:11:38] 后来李道宗啊

[00:11:40] 有个女儿

[00:11:42] 她和丈夫分手之后

[00:11:44] 这个女孩儿留在家里就给了李密

[00:11:48] 李密又当了李道宗的姑爷了

[00:11:52] 没想到过了不久

[00:11:55] 李道宗的女儿蛮横不讲理

[00:11:58] 夫妻吵架被李密给杀了

[00:12:01] 杀了之后

[00:12:02] 他害怕就和王伯党逃出京城

[00:12:07] 分潼关

[00:12:08] 李道宗得姓之后

[00:12:10] 派人追杀

[00:12:12] 追到潼关上

[00:12:14] 那李密一步登空掉下悬崖

[00:12:18] 王八长为救她也摔死了

[00:12:22] 噢

[00:12:24] 里儿听到这儿点点头

[00:12:27] A

[00:12:28] 那个肖飞呢

[00:12:29] 嗨

[00:12:31] 消费更有意思

[00:12:33] 这个女人不老实

[00:12:37] 他认为

[00:12:38] 建成元吉不保靠

[00:12:41] 有一回他去敲秦王李世民的屋门

[00:12:46] 李世民听说他是Xiao Hu 亡国之妇

[00:12:51] 连喊带叫惊动了御林兵

[00:12:54] 御林兵去拖肖飞的时候

[00:12:57] 一下子脑袋碰在墙上死了

[00:13:01] 哦

[00:13:04] 黑白二位夫人听这话点点头啊

[00:13:08] 嗨

[00:13:08] 这帮女人的下场

[00:13:10] 可都够惨的

[00:13:12] 经得乐了

[00:13:14] 哈哈

[00:13:14] 你们俩够好的

[00:13:16] 行啊

[00:13:16] 别胡说了

[00:13:18] 我们给你收拾收拾

[00:13:20] 你明天好走

[00:13:21] 嗯

[00:13:22] 明天早上我跟四哥去长安

[00:13:25] 出兵征讨苏烈

[00:13:27] 你们就在这等我

[00:13:29] 等我得胜回朝

[00:13:31] 再回山西来接你们将军

[00:13:35] 你自管放心去

[00:13:37] 家中有我们姐俩呢

[00:13:39] 再说我们也是马上战将御风的衣品夫人

[00:13:44] 你有什么不放心的你自己多注意

[00:13:48] 我和孩子在家等你呢

[00:13:50] A 好

[00:13:51] 程咬金一听双挑大拇哥呀

[00:13:55] 二位弟妹真是明白人呐

[00:13:58] 好好好老黑

[00:14:00] 这回放心了吧

[00:14:01] 就这样

[00:14:02] 几个人推杯换盏

[00:14:04] 尽兴而散

[00:14:05] 第二天天刚亮

[00:14:07] 程咬金起来

[00:14:08] 洗漱已毕

[00:14:09] 带着50 名jun 族和尉迟恭辞别了二位夫人

[00:14:13] 离开了堡林庄

[00:14:15] 返回长安

[00:14:17] 这一天来到长安

[00:14:20] 程咬金先把竞得带到帅府

[00:14:24] 叫他见秦琼和徐茂公

[00:14:27] 各位弟兄

[00:14:28] 大家免不了一番寒暄

[00:14:31] 秦琼那个人摆上酒宴为敬德接风

[00:14:35] 席间徐茂公说说利亚

[00:14:38] 这次你前往山西是不是为班竟得知是a 转了一子啦

[00:14:45] 哈哈

[00:14:46] 可不是吗

[00:14:47] 我原以为老黑憨厚耿直

[00:14:50] 没想到也学会了用计谋了

[00:14:53] 差点把我给蒙了

[00:14:55] 接着就把劲得怎么装病自己怎么夜闹堡

[00:15:00] 林庄的事儿说了一遍

[00:15:02] 大家听了目瞪口呆

[00:15:05] 徐茂公满满斟上一杯酒

[00:15:09] 端到经得经前经得兄弟啊

[00:15:12] 你如今会用G

[00:15:14] 真是可喜可贺呀

[00:15:18] 尉迟敬德脸腾就红了

[00:15:20] 三哥

[00:15:21] 你别拿兄弟开玩笑

[00:15:23] 诸位

[00:15:24] 明天到金殿上

[00:15:26] 你们可别提这码子事儿

[00:15:28] 免得万岁怪罪

[00:15:30] 放心吧

[00:15:31] 我们不会说的

[00:15:33] 到了次日清晨

[00:15:35] 李世民争做大宝点头

[00:15:38] 官喊道

[00:15:40] 万岁之下

[00:15:41] 有本早奏

[00:15:43] 无本卷帘退朝啦

[00:15:47] 秦琼出班奏道

[00:15:49] 万岁

[00:15:50] 今有鲁国公程咬金从山西搬请来尉迟恭

[00:15:55] 现在在午门后直

[00:15:59] 李世民心中大喜

[00:16:01] 哎呀

[00:16:02] 成王兄浴池

[00:16:04] 王兄归来

[00:16:05] 快宣上殿见驾

[00:16:09] 点头关走到店口冲下边儿

[00:16:12] 高寒万岁

[00:16:13] 有旨宣程咬金

[00:16:16] 尉迟恭添加啊

[00:16:20] 二人说声遵旨

[00:16:23] 来到了金店

[00:16:24] 双膝跪倒

[00:16:26] 程咬金尉迟恭参减

[00:16:29] 吾皇万岁万万岁

[00:16:33] 二位亲家免礼

[00:16:35] 平身谢万岁

[00:16:38] 与施工这几年你过得怎么样

[00:16:42] 嗯

[00:16:43] 挺好挺好

[00:16:44] 托万岁福

[00:16:45] 哎

[00:16:47] 本来叫你们这些武将应该在家多住些日子

[00:16:52] 怎奈苏烈苏定方领兵犯境啊

[00:16:56] 呃

[00:16:57] 万岁

[00:16:58] 忌吃狂风

[00:17:00] 当报君恩

[00:17:01] 好尉迟将军镇

[00:17:05] 封你为扫北评书前补正印先锋官臣遵旨

[00:17:13] 尉迟恭说了句疾驰

[00:17:16] 黄凤当报君恩

[00:17:19] 不光是秦琼徐茂公

[00:17:23] 所有瓦刚山的战象都觉得奇怪

[00:17:27] 哎哟

[00:17:28] 三年不见尉迟敬德怎么会说话呢

[00:17:32] 还会说文词儿呢

[00:17:34] 是啊

[00:17:35] 他的两个夫人厉害呀

[00:17:37] 每天教他呀

[00:17:39] 说你当这么大官

[00:17:41] 你不认识字

[00:17:41] 那哪行呢

[00:17:42] 满嘴胡说不行啊

[00:17:44] 我们教你尉迟恭像小学生一样在家里拼训

[00:17:50] 所以现在出来不太露倩

[00:17:53] 李世民对秦琼徐茂公说

[00:17:56] 二位王兄

[00:17:57] 现在尉迟将军已经归队

[00:18:00] 你们俩人可程咬金可点齐兵马择选吉日启程

[00:18:07] 臣遵旨

[00:18:09] 李世民甩袖退朝

[00:18:13] 秦琼等人出了午门

[00:18:15] 直奔教军场点啦

[00:18:17] 20万人马又请徐茂公选了吉日

[00:18:21] 率军出京伐北

[00:18:26] 要出兵这天

[00:18:27] 李世民领着百官相送到十里长亭

[00:18:33] 这才洒泪而别

[00:18:35] 单说秦琼、尉迟恭率领20 万人去讨伐苏定方

[00:18:41] 在当时日出工成了天下第一好汉

[00:18:45] 是啊

[00:18:46] 罗成故去了

[00:18:48] 现在就得属尉迟恭了

[00:18:51] 他胯下马掌中一杆龟背驼龙枪杀的敌军闻风丧胆

[00:18:58] 不战自降

[00:19:00] 一路上势如破竹

[00:19:02] 风卷残云一样

[00:19:04] 不费多大力气就来到白良关下

[00:19:09] 这首白良关的主将叫王宏基出马迎敌

[00:19:14] 他哪抵得住静得的大枪啊

[00:19:18] 两个照面就败阵灰关回到乐观城内

[00:19:23] 来到帅府嗨声叹气

[00:19:26] 他犯愁了

[00:19:27] A

[00:19:29] 今天要造反

[00:19:30] 明天要造反

[00:19:31] 这可反啦

[00:19:32] 现在好

[00:19:34] 人家大唐朝天兵天将到这儿了

[00:19:39] 我能敌得了吗

[00:19:41] 就在这阵儿

[00:19:42] 从外边儿腾腾走进一个小伙子

[00:19:47] 上前躬身施礼富帅

[00:19:49] 你为何嗨声叹气

[00:19:52] 哎

[00:19:53] 儿子

[00:19:54] 维护着仗不好打呀

[00:19:57] 此次唐朝出兵前部正印先锋官名叫玉石工

[00:20:02] 此人英勇无敌

[00:20:04] 想当年曾日抢三关夜夺八寨勇的协警啊

[00:20:10] 今天为复出战败在他手下

[00:20:14] 敢说你爹爹手中这杆大刀无人敢惹

[00:20:17] 可今天竟败给了尉迟恭

[00:20:21] 看来白良关保不住了

[00:20:24] 为此为父叹气

[00:20:27] 他儿子听这话不以为然

[00:20:30] 爹爹不用担心

[00:20:33] 不就是一个尉迟恭吗

[00:20:35] 明天孩儿出关会谈

[00:20:37] 并将他项上人头提来揭谜

[00:20:42] 王宏基一听就生气了

[00:20:44] 出口

[00:20:45] 小孩子少出廊檐说大话

[00:20:49] 明天不许你出站在维护在思良色

[00:20:55] 哎呀爹呀

[00:20:56] 自幼您给我找了多少高师教我午夜不就是为了长大为国效力吗

[00:21:04] 您的教诲我铭记在心

[00:21:06] 如果我打不了尉迟恭

[00:21:08] 你在想良策不迟啊

[00:21:11] 王宏基听落勉强给你投

[00:21:14] 嗯正版

[00:21:16] 明天你出马琳战能打则打

[00:21:20] 不能打就回来

[00:21:22] 为父不怪嗨

[00:21:25] 不会的

[00:21:25] 你放心吧

[00:21:27] 妹妹说了

[00:21:28] 王红旗的儿子叫什么呢

[00:21:31] 叫王宝林今年16 岁

[00:21:34] 自幼王洪基拿她当掌上明珠

[00:21:39] 请了许多武林高手教他武艺

[00:21:43] 二五更的功夫练了八九年

[00:21:46] 现在马上不下长拳短打

[00:21:49] 十八般兵器样样精通

[00:21:52] 所以王宝林才要会战尉迟恭

[00:21:56] 第二天王宝林饱餐战饭点了

[00:21:59] 3000人马冲出观城

[00:22:01] 来到对前列

[00:22:03] 开队伍就得逃掉

[00:22:04] 镇是aa

[00:22:07] 大唐军兵

[00:22:08] 听着教李佳逐渐过来受死

[00:22:12] 有军兵往里送信

[00:22:15] 秦琼德信而立

[00:22:16] 几点人马带着程咬金尉迟恭来到疆场

[00:22:20] 两军对阵小将王宝林双脚踹凳

[00:22:25] 胯下马一声嘶鸣

[00:22:27] 抬腿摘下大枪扑棱掌中一斗

[00:22:30] 日赤峰

[00:22:31] 你出来受死