《当渣男碰到渣片（下）》歌词

[00:00:00] 本字幕由腾讯音乐天琴实验室独家AI字幕技术生成

[00:00:01] 短暂的休息过后啊

[00:00:02] 欢迎来到打死我

[00:00:04] 你也猜不出的游戏环节呢

[00:00:06] 我vito 就再来介绍一下游戏规则了

[00:00:09] 接下来呢

[00:00:09] 我们会给大家放一段大家都耳熟能详

[00:00:12] 基本都没听过的

[00:00:14] 基本都听过的

[00:00:15] 基本都听过的歌曲

[00:00:16] 在歌曲的前奏和整首歌的第一个字会发给大家

[00:00:20] 那大家就竖起你们的小耳朵仔细听好

[00:00:22] 这首是什么歌

[00:00:23] 猜出答案的朋友啊

[00:00:24] 马上到我们的歪果

[00:00:26] 电台的微信公众号后台直接留言歌名就好了

[00:00:28] 对在微信搜索里输入不正经的那个Y

[00:00:31] 果然很好笑的果就能找到我们歪果电台的微信公众号啦

[00:00:36] 第一个答对的听众朋友将获得三个月的歪果电台VIP 可以随时随地畅听所有节目和各种好歌曲

[00:00:45] 之后答对的朋友啊

[00:00:46] 也将获得一个月的VIP

[00:00:48] 是不是很大方呢

[00:00:49] 为什么每次的广告都是我来念呢

[00:00:51] 因为你比较适合这个环节哎

[00:00:54] 好了

[00:00:54] 介绍完简单的规则和我们的这个奖品之后

[00:00:57] 我们接下来就进入正题

[00:00:59] 来听一下这首歌的前奏吧

[00:01:11] 啊

[00:01:16] 怎么样

[00:01:16] 有没有答案了呢

[00:01:18] 猜出来的小宝贝们记得到我们外国电台的微信公众号后台留言呀

[00:01:24] 我们的获奖名单会在下周的节目里面公布同时啊

[00:01:27] 微信公众号里也会在下周二有名单公布

[00:01:31] 所以记得时时follow 我们公众号哟

[00:01:33] 那最后呢

[00:01:34] 我就来给大家公布一下我们上期节目的获奖选手、获奖选手、获奖听众们的名单

[00:01:40] 他们是

[00:01:41] 嗯对啦

[00:01:43] 幼儿幼

[00:01:44] 幼稚园幼儿园

[00:01:45] 幼稚园的小霸王

[00:01:47] 还有疯狂的裤衩和秋刀鱼这三位同学

[00:01:51] 这些用户们

[00:01:52] 记得到后台私戳一下我们的客服MM 呃

[00:01:54] 温柔一点出获得VIP 邀请码啦

[00:01:59] Be my wife re I be fair it are you you can t c mi Le re s na 的M

[00:02:13] I went there re trans and you the sun sets re af fir s tar el in the c u play come out and play mi I m wearing a dollars three re my Apple tree um I know in to my salad lo and be deli friends forever know the work has been so madly and love can hurt badly and soul recent s alley but does na Di en close you re my 哈

[00:03:02] Ache and I still have a sweater and sings a look it better on overnight 呗

[00:03:14] The ses are playing a I can play with you Mei da re ga the you know the salad or it will be jolly friends forever

[00:03:30] 啊

[00:03:44] The cell making matters I play mi and bring it dollars re coming up my Apple tree set on my way nes into mice and rats and will be telling friends forever 猫

[00:04:00] C c ou Mei Mei want you play with mi and bring your dollars re in to my sal a dog and will be 哈喽大家好欢迎回来感谢你持续锁定VM 的V 嘎写吐槽专栏节目一个小游戏过后啊我们继续吐槽2017 年度十大国产烂片刚刚阿里头和次次大家带大家回顾了大闹天竺欢乐喜剧人麻烦家族京城81 号第二部青禾男高以及悟空传真辛苦你如果大家没有听到之前的节目呢

[00:04:39] 可以关注我们的重播

[00:04:41] 把前面的补一下好了

[00:04:42] 好了

[00:04:42] 不要打广告啦

[00:04:43] 接下来我们来聊一聊那部为我们贡献了不少吐槽好梗的三生三世十里桃花这部电影啊

[00:04:51] 我还真的是在影院里看过

[00:04:52] 而且不是我主动去看

[00:04:54] 是被一个女同学硬拉去看你知道吗

[00:04:57] 据说这部电影的男女主角人选就落在你

[00:05:00] 被一个女同学硬拉去看

[00:05:02] 但是我就是不接你的梗

[00:05:04] 接着说

[00:05:04] 嗯

[00:05:05] 好不容易有一个女朋友

[00:05:06] 我去看电影

[00:05:07] 然后你就把我放过了

[00:05:08] 那位同学是你妈妈

[00:05:10] 也就是刘亦菲和杨洋

[00:05:12] 是阿里影业啊

[00:05:13] 通过大数据运算出来的结果

[00:05:15] 甚至连目标观众的星座都有明确的指向

[00:05:18] 这可不可谓不玄幻啊

[00:05:20] 哎

[00:05:20] 你说到这个大数据和三生三世

[00:05:22] 老觉得自己念不对呢

[00:05:24] 说到大数据和三生三世

[00:05:26] 我又想到之前就是央视报道说

[00:05:28] 电视剧版的三生三世就是杨幂和赵又廷演的那个版本啊

[00:05:32] 他们疯狂的注水日增

[00:05:34] 14 亿的播放量

[00:05:36] 这意味着什么呢

[00:05:37] 意味着你家隔壁遛鸟的二大爷和他刚刚学会走路的小孙子都要兢兢业业

[00:05:44] 一天看两遍

[00:05:46] 这部剧啊

[00:05:47] 身在网络时代的我们真的好累

[00:05:50] 每天要赶场为各大电视剧的点击率贡献我们的鸿毛之力a

[00:05:55] 这可能就是谁出钱谁就有好作品吧

[00:05:57] 谁出钱谁就能说话了啊

[00:05:59] 再回来说说这个

[00:06:00] 电影版的三生三世十里桃花

[00:06:02] 我是刚才说了嘛

[00:06:04] 直接进电影院看的

[00:06:05] 居然看的呀

[00:06:06] 是有点儿这个

[00:06:06] 一脸懵逼

[00:06:07] 别人说看过原著小说我就能看懂

[00:06:10] 但是如果我看个电影还要做个前期预习或者后期再补补课

[00:06:14] 这未免也太浪费我的时间了吧

[00:06:16] 又是这种电影

[00:06:17] 对啊

[00:06:17] 我也是啊

[00:06:18] 这部电影我觉得就是针对能够读得懂梗的那些粉丝们吧

[00:06:22] 我在电影院里看的时候也是有些糊涂

[00:06:25] 就产生了一些心理挫败感

[00:06:27] 为啥

[00:06:27] 老子看不懂啊

[00:06:28] 老娘看不懂

[00:06:29] 为啥性别紊乱这样行不行

[00:06:32] 激素问题啊

[00:06:33] 这是为啥

[00:06:34] 老娘看不懂啊

[00:06:36] 不要把我们录节目的这个现实问题带入到我们的节目当中啊

[00:06:40] 这个片名三生三世的意思

[00:06:42] 在我看来应该就是三段穿越的爱情故事

[00:06:45] 如果没看错的话

[00:06:46] 对于一部小说或者是电视连续剧来说

[00:06:48] 哎

[00:06:49] 这是完全有问题的

[00:06:50] 可以娓娓道来

[00:06:51] 一点一点的来讲

[00:06:52] 但如果捏在一部两个小时的电影里面呢

[00:06:55] 能把故事讲清楚就已经是实属不易的事情了

[00:06:58] 但是看完电影我发现啊

[00:07:00] 我替导演操心的太多了

[00:07:02] 就像是动作片

[00:07:03] 时长不够

[00:07:03] 一个字就是干

[00:07:06] 就是这样子

[00:07:07] 三生三世的这个时长啊

[00:07:09] 简直太长了

[00:07:10] 那没有问题

[00:07:11] 一个字就是砍

[00:07:13] 我可以感受到你说的这个意思

[00:07:15] Get 到你了

[00:07:16] 首先呢

[00:07:16] 这个导演啊

[00:07:17] 把所有交代仙界世界观的内容统统一刀切了

[00:07:21] 你不需要知道这些神仙是从哪儿来到哪儿去

[00:07:24] 家里几口人啊

[00:07:26] 就是反正他们自己用

[00:07:27] 反正他们想飞就飞

[00:07:29] 想活几万岁就活几万岁

[00:07:31] 导演说了算

[00:07:32] 我最大

[00:07:33] 所以呢

[00:07:34] 我们这些不知道背景的吃瓜群众坐在电影院也就根本看不懂了

[00:07:38] 还有就是啊

[00:07:38] 把所有交代人物成长的桥段也都统统砍掉了

[00:07:41] 男女主就这样

[00:07:42] 突如其来的fall in love 坠入了爱河里面

[00:07:45] 并且畅游的那是爱的死去活来啊

[00:07:48] 意义嗯

[00:07:49] 好湿啊

[00:07:50] 360 度展示了他们拥抱亲吻

[00:07:53] 当然画面虽然是蛮好看的

[00:07:55] 蛮养眼的

[00:07:56] 但就是感觉特别突兀

[00:07:58] 就感觉导演让你爱

[00:07:59] 你就必须得爱

[00:08:00] A 呢我爱你

[00:08:01] 你还得必须回来爱我

[00:08:03] 对对

[00:08:03] 对有一个印象很深刻的画面啊

[00:08:05] 就是刘亦菲扮演的高冷无比的白浅盛世

[00:08:10] 对上一秒还找杨洋扮演的叶华约束去打一架呢

[00:08:14] 这个下一秒就莫名其妙地同意夜华在自己家住下了

[00:08:18] 不打不相识

[00:08:19] 仅住下了还睡一张床

[00:08:21] 哎呦

[00:08:21] 真的是羞羞脸哦

[00:08:23] 然后这个电影的精华部分就来了夜华展示了一套海底捞拉面神功

[00:08:29] 对对

[00:08:29] 从此就你存在我深深的脑海里

[00:08:34] 这个爱的小火苗儿烧的那是噼里啪啦噼里啪啦这一段广告啊

[00:08:38] 不是广告

[00:08:39] 这一段拉面神功我还是记忆犹新啊哎

[00:08:41] 那就是除了这个故事情节本身

[00:08:43] 电影的美国和特效其实也堪称是车祸现场

[00:08:46] 导演赵小丁本来是张艺谋的御用摄影

[00:08:49] 在摄影转型之后

[00:08:51] 当导演遇到的最大问题就是很容易把画面凌驾于讲故事之上

[00:08:55] 但是你画面如果好看那也就算了

[00:08:58] 三生三世里面却是充满了那些死

[00:09:00] 就像你刚才说的

[00:09:01] 塑料感的东西

[00:09:02] 高饱和度的五颜六色

[00:09:04] 个人认为啊

[00:09:05] 还不如30 年前的那个八六版的西游记呢

[00:09:08] 我之前还听到个说法

[00:09:09] 就是阿里表示现在就不需要专业的编剧啦

[00:09:13] 只要有大IP 和流量明星

[00:09:16] 那就是稳赚不赔的呀

[00:09:18] 哎

[00:09:18] 希望这样的粉丝电影啊

[00:09:20] 还是不要太多的充斥在主流市场

[00:09:23] 不然我就真的不知道进电影院要看什么啦

[00:09:27] 吐槽了这么多

[00:09:27] 我们来听首歌转换一下心情

[00:09:30] pink champagne 把一首粉红色的香槟送给各位

[00:09:33] 希望我们每天的生活都能幸福的冒粉红泡泡

[00:09:37] 同样粉红的还有右下角的小草莓哦

[00:09:39] 可以点一下

[00:09:44] 噢

[00:09:44] 拉起嘎油嘎that we go when you know when needed I where go go right now I need to see you go upstairs and we can drink some dance and Korea are baby too true every guy have been Dis club is looking at you I know I m a little shy and got at the time and try my luck in hello are you are you got that baby 吧

[00:10:22] Baby Kim I mt a I m just what you do your thing sip ing all 黑were re over size nineteen eighty the rolling stones the shy butt better keep my mouth shut I I m just what you do you think

[00:10:44] In on that were were dancing I over size nineteen eighty re se Ram I bet you hardly strike the middle of the summer and I really want to see you want to come to ur ti que that better than any of love and if I dont see you working out the door just know that I didi mean to say hello before you left and I think you should hear re sometimes and u Su perf ion here

[00:11:29] You got that baby BABA BABA lucky my my shirt I m just what you do your thing sip in on that we were dancing in my over size nineteen eighty the roll and row seat belt I keep my mouth shut I m just what you do your thing sip ping on that pink champagne a u ga Le were were Dis in my over size nineteen eighty

[00:12:08] 嗯

[00:12:08] 嗯

[00:12:15] 嗯

[00:12:19] 嗯

[00:12:21] 嗯

[00:12:22] 嗯

[00:12:25] You got that bibi BABA BABA lucky my my show I m just what you do you think sleeping on work

[00:12:39] S nine over size nineteen eighty the rolling stones the shot a bun bury keep my mouth shot I m just what you do you re playing artwork ever seen I over size nineteen a bs role in Sen si ti Shi er

[00:13:05] 听完歌了

[00:13:06] 欢迎回来

[00:13:07] 我们继续来总结17年十大国产烂片

[00:13:10] 刚刚疯狂吐槽完了这个三生三世十里桃花

[00:13:13] 接下来咱们再来说一说大家应该都去看过的

[00:13:16] 叫心里

[00:13:17] 其实听这个名字啊

[00:13:19] 我就觉得会是我喜欢的那种悬疑烧脑推理剧啊

[00:13:22] 而且看了这个演员阵容我还是蛮喜欢的

[00:13:25] 廖凡就不说了

[00:13:26] 就凭借着白日烟火获得了柏林米D 对

[00:13:30] 然后万茜呢

[00:13:31] 凭借着你好疯子里面的精彩表现获得了金马奖的女配角

[00:13:35] 作为李易峰也曾经获得了百花电影节的最佳男配角呢

[00:13:40] 嗯

[00:13:41] 没错啦

[00:13:42] 就是你这种口中看上去还不错的演员阵容

[00:13:46] 但这个导演啊却没有把握好

[00:13:48] 整部电影就像是套路的叠加

[00:13:50] 分明是拼智商的一部推理电影

[00:13:52] 却硬生生的把主角方木包装成了一个算命先生

[00:13:56] 电影一开头连尸体都没验就凭借着自己独特的嗅觉找到了真凶

[00:14:02] 福尔摩斯的棺材板我帮你按住了

[00:14:04] 你自己就随意发挥吧

[00:14:06] 方木同志是偷看剧本了吧

[00:14:08] 而且他很可能看错剧本了

[00:14:10] 他拿的呀

[00:14:11] 可能是通灵神探的剧本

[00:14:13] 除了在犯罪现场开启了无限的上帝视角

[00:14:16] 我们的方木神探还有一条莫名其妙的感情线

[00:14:21] 这个谈起恋爱来啊

[00:14:22] 这位这位算命的就上知天文

[00:14:25] 下知地理的心理大师

[00:14:27] 却突然变得特别的腼腆

[00:14:29] 就是上知天文下知地理

[00:14:31] 就是不懂女人心的

[00:14:32] 嗯

[00:14:33] 很真实了吧

[00:14:35] 但是啊

[00:14:35] 除了男主角

[00:14:36] 方木配角

[00:14:37] 廖凡的角色其实也没把握好

[00:14:39] 他一会儿硬一会儿软

[00:14:42] 我说的是性格

[00:14:43] 你咋总往外面的东西想

[00:14:45] 我不是这个意思啊

[00:14:47] 我说的是我刚才讲的性格

[00:14:49] 你要把他当成一个角色来看

[00:14:51] 但是塑造铁汉柔情的人设

[00:14:54] 你也没有必要让他直接念出警察要有人性关怀这样可怕的台词

[00:14:59] 感觉像领导发言

[00:15:00] 而且很违和

[00:15:01] 不够狠

[00:15:02] 很造作

[00:15:02] 不够日常

[00:15:03] 好吧

[00:15:03] 其实还有一部类似题材的电影

[00:15:05] 我有看过

[00:15:06] 而且自己还是蛮喜欢的

[00:15:08] 叫做目击者

[00:15:09] 哎哟你们知道看得不少

[00:15:10] 对不知道你们看过没有啊

[00:15:12] 喜欢这类推理题材的听众朋友可以去看一下

[00:15:15] 那么接下来呢

[00:15:16] 把一首有点特别的new word 送给各位

[00:15:19] 里面有我们中国的女re per 拉拉参加演唱he e d m 的大老黄爪跨界合作效果如何呢

[00:15:26] 我们一起来听听看吧

[00:15:28] 听完这首歌之后呢

[00:15:29] 我们再来近一段小小小小的广告

[00:15:31] 我们回来接着揭晓17年十大烂片老规矩

[00:15:34] 喜欢节目

[00:15:34] 记得屏幕下方点赞走起

[00:15:36] 你广告说的越来越敷衍了老规矩

[00:15:39] 喜欢节目记得屏幕右下方点赞哟

[00:16:00] The tele ki d m killing making noise on that el the boys in other fast you are on Le ga Liz on me like tomorrow tomorrow its in your readers are always show me 喽

[00:16:14] 拜拜

[00:16:15] I wish I take him back a formal re si den in sh el silver si nu er bad boys and girls is a nu er new ers yes we cannot we cannot afford

[00:17:02] 夫人度过的

[00:17:04] 光一起找他订了娱乐圈的C 挂的光镜让我地球上

[00:17:09] 我比你活得更洋

[00:17:11] 庆幸世界充满欲望

[00:17:12] When the baby 王总巴黎咖喱咖喱咖喱咖喱嘎嘎

[00:17:21] 我不懂

[00:17:22] 便怀着他我想要的图片说我也能够得到怒er new ers the bad boys and girls is a nu er new ers yes we got in on we got we got na nana we disagree about ur k

[00:17:57] 嗯

[00:18:21] 嗯

[00:18:33] 啊

[00:18:49] You used to call me on my cellphone

[00:19:10] 陪我high

[00:19:13] Hello hello

[00:19:23] 沙利文无赖风格那嘶嘶声最大王才有幸福

[00:19:35] You used to call me on my cellphone when I when you needed 么

[00:19:57] 嗯

[00:19:57] 嗯

[00:20:07] 每次都比I made him ever since I never see you ve made you you make me feel likes to work 如此喽

[00:20:39] STU

[00:20:41] U ga exactly what were stored run and paintings on your ass hey you with a girl I never mi el you used to call me home

[00:20:57] Ain I we Li I love myself love lane erwin here I love I know when I I I could we won a meal when I had re re re Ren Li mi

[00:21:24] 温温温温

[00:21:33] Talking in my sleep at night making myself crazy Le Le I wrote down a red it out and open new words lamy top Li mi tat sat 么

[00:21:51] He makes you feel like know ba d l know ba d l o Mo it does and we re s Mo sl

[00:22:07] Pick up the phone you know is know no om in u s taking out again three dont be expensive and you gonna play in the morning in the know Le nov er am I gotta know I count

[00:22:42] For his cor ne bi were narrow narrow down sending him back from I finally see 的bed re Lu Lu b 组啊

[00:23:01] 怎么走

[00:23:03] I style I dont wake up there and we re only going alone lonely in u k q again re lonely is right and you gonna play in the morning and I ro ned I gotta know re count

[00:23:39] Le maker maker I m still trying any ideas in recent years every painted re nes mee se que re tre mor ri Gan k I know I know I cannot

[00:24:49] 啊

[00:25:03] The way back home in Dis game and it s like Jack one of those names on an ever be lied his friend was gone and he called me a b*tch again re live the grounds ha and he told me that we make it To Graduate so I talk to the music be worth the way that he wants me and you can actually I believe I believe I believe I believe that went o b j I cgi cgi cgi cgi past AR mi Le I dont mean of forestry but I always makes a mistake you always makes a six cars shots to u can play me for trying you know I will be re en c e re finally speaks me looking at my history lets go away cat arc org ani ard I thought that he can really be to one s town but I never get a chance to make a man because she fell in love a little thing wild ly and single

[00:26:04] Ion it all no one but you look so q Bo ga tu ate to do but I always think about I Wen I believe I believe I believe I believe I mean to d j I see you I cgi cgi c ne Le I dont mean a story but I always makes a mistake always makes a six cars you can play me for trying you know I b il lions a ur re finally fix me looking up my history amp ang Ling dao Ling dao in ur r t har

[00:26:57] *稣

[00:27:01] 腾讯音乐天琴实验室的小耳朵们

[00:27:03] 你们好

[00:27:03] 从现在开始呢

[00:27:04] 歪果电台就要长住腾讯音乐天琴实验室啦

[00:27:07] 至于不知道歪果电台的朋友们呢

[00:27:09] 在这里给大家安利一下歪果电台

[00:27:12] 致力于为北美华人打造北美生活文化的分享平台

[00:27:16] 以故事和音乐相结合的方式展示北美华人的生活

[00:27:20] 无论你在北美的哪一个角落

[00:27:22] 总会有人陪你一起听故事听音乐

[00:27:25] 如果大家在这里还没有听够

[00:27:28] 欢迎搜索外国电台微信小程序外国Vigo 1起来收听外国最新的节目

[00:27:35] 大家还可以关注外国V 购公众号

[00:27:38] 与主播互动

[00:27:39] 给身边的朋友点歌或者给我们投稿

[00:27:42] 这里是歪果电台

[00:27:43] 用故事听音乐

[00:27:45] 让北美灵魂不再孤单

[00:27:52] 无偿的广告回来了

[00:27:53] 欢迎持续锁定我们的VIGA 吐槽专栏

[00:27:57] 今天啊

[00:27:57] 咱们聊的是一七年度十大国产烂片

[00:28:00] 下一步咱们要说的是吴宇森

[00:28:02] 吴大导的追捕这部我倒是没有看过

[00:28:05] 但是我好像记得就是日本有一部蛮老的片子也叫这个名字啊

[00:28:09] 聪明

[00:28:10] 看来你这个年龄还真的是没有被时间的潮水

[00:28:13] 大家注意一下

[00:28:13] 聪明啊

[00:28:15] 我的人设建立了起来

[00:28:16] 重点是后半句

[00:28:17] 你的实际

[00:28:18] 你的年龄还没有被时间的潮水所所冲垮

[00:28:21] 说你的主题

[00:28:22] 这个追捕当年可是捧红了一个特别特别牛的演员

[00:28:25] 就是高仓健那个话说

[00:28:27] 可是在30年前了

[00:28:28] 高仓健凭着一部追捕红遍了大江南北

[00:28:31] 尤其是我们中国

[00:28:33] 他饰演的杜秋这个铁血硬汉的角色也成为了一代人的时代记忆

[00:28:38] 于是30 年后

[00:28:39] 吴宇森就把这部经典的追捕拿出来给翻拍了

[00:28:42] 哎

[00:28:42] 但是说实话

[00:28:43] 除了故事框架和人物名字

[00:28:45] 剩下的基本和原作没有太大关系

[00:28:48] 那其实我把这个星座当成全新的故事来看应该也不要紧啊

[00:28:52] 呃

[00:28:53] 你说的也对吧

[00:28:54] 我们的吴宇森导演呢

[00:28:55] 是非常的sweet

[00:28:56] 非常的贴心的特例的提醒

[00:28:59] 大家说啊

[00:28:59] 这部电影是拍给没有看过老板追捕的年轻人看的

[00:29:02] 我觉得这个提醒是非常必要的

[00:29:04] 因为如果你看过原版的话

[00:29:06] 你应该和我一样会被气到吐血吧

[00:29:08] 有没有这么夸张啊

[00:29:10] 我看主演是张涵予啊

[00:29:11] 我很喜欢张涵予的这个吴宇森加上张涵予

[00:29:15] 听上去没有那么的烂啊

[00:29:17] 那这么说吧

[00:29:18] 这部电影用四个字来形容就是不可思议

[00:29:21] 每一个情节都充满了不可思议

[00:29:23] 就拿你刚刚说的张涵予来举例子

[00:29:25] 他饰演的杜秋是日本某个制药厂的律师

[00:29:29] 战无不胜

[00:29:30] 深受领导重视

[00:29:31] 但是不可思议的是他不会说日语

[00:29:34] 更不可思议的是和他接触的每个日本人居然都在说中文啊

[00:29:39] 这本土化嘛

[00:29:40] 入乡随俗嘛

[00:29:41] 这个也就算了

[00:29:42] 除了人物和故事情节方面呢

[00:29:45] 在情节方面就更是扯上佳扯了

[00:29:47] 好吧

[00:29:47] 某一天杜秋醒来

[00:29:49] 发现身旁躺着一个已经呃

[00:29:51] 凉透了的美女

[00:29:52] 然后他立马

[00:29:53] 报案了

[00:29:53] 这位战无不胜的王牌律师面对警察说的第一句话

[00:29:56] 你猜是什么

[00:29:57] 是我要联系我的律师

[00:30:00] 你TM 自己就是个律师

[00:30:02] 好吗你清醒一点啊

[00:30:03] 警察打电话报警啊

[00:30:05] 这个这个律师也术业有专攻嘛

[00:30:08] 我原谅他这句台词啊

[00:30:10] 他报警了

[00:30:11] 然后呢

[00:30:12] 后来他进行了亡命天涯的逃亡

[00:30:15] 然后遇见了一个老大爷

[00:30:17] 老大爷给他吃给他穿

[00:30:18] 还各方面来营救他

[00:30:20] 为了救他甚至不惜去袭警

[00:30:22] 我以为这位老大爷肯定是有什么背景啊

[00:30:25] 不得不讲的不为人知的故事

[00:30:27] 或者是有了不起的背景

[00:30:29] 结果呢

[00:30:30] 他居然就是个普通的老大爷

[00:30:33] 嗯嗯

[00:30:34] 这不是提倡还是好人多

[00:30:35] 蓝天下的至爱

[00:30:36] 社会的人文关怀嘛

[00:30:38] 你不能因为对张涵予的无限喜爱就原谅他777 次

[00:30:42] 总而言之

[00:30:43] 这部电影充满着各种的不可思议

[00:30:45] 如果你想要找找电影里有多少令人出息的bug

[00:30:48] 就欢迎你去看一下这部吴宇森导演版本的追捕

[00:30:52] 下面啊

[00:30:52] 把这

[00:30:53] 温森送给各位

[00:30:54] 回来我们再来聊聊奇门遁甲

[00:30:56] 奇门遁甲可是不得不听的飞

[00:31:00] Lookout on a summer said a word I said no that darkness in my soul shadows on the hills

[00:31:12] Sketch that reason for breath catch decrease the winter chills in colours on the snowy linen re

[00:31:25] Now I understand

[00:31:30] Wed you try to sh mi ly how you suffered for your sanity

[00:31:39] Hao you try to set them free they were not listen it did not know Hao

[00:31:46] Perhaps l si NAO

[00:31:51] Starry starry night flaming flowers and bright Li plays swimming classes and fire his reflect in Vincent I the China blue colors changing you morning fields of amber grain weather faces lined in pain are Soo beneath the artist loving hand now re understand

[00:32:27] What you tried to c h o Li Hao you suffered for your sanity Hao you try to set them free they were not the sun nee did not know Hao

[00:32:43] Perhaps they listen 孬Ford a could not love you

[00:32:50] Steal your love story to and when no hopes left inside on that starry starry night you took your life is love is often do that I could hold you in cent world was never meant for one as beautiful as you

[00:33:15] Starry starry night portraits hang on and the whole frame less heads on nameless walls which I isa watch the world in comfort h strange that you recommend in Iraq e the phone bloody Rose lie crushed and broken on the virgin snow

[00:33:49] Now I think I know

[00:33:54] Well you try to sh od and how you suffered for your sanity

[00:34:03] Hao you try to set them free they were not listen that not listening skills pops they never ri

[00:34:29] 听完歌回来

[00:34:30] 我们来聊一聊2017年12月上映的奇门遁甲

[00:34:34] 这部电影啊

[00:34:35] 可以说真的是给我2017年的阅片事业画上了一个完美的句点

[00:34:41] 可以说是一整年

[00:34:42] 我在电影院里观影体验最差的一部电影啊

[00:34:46] 我真的不敢相信这部电影居然是由徐克和袁和平这两位武侠老炮一起拍出来的

[00:34:53] 同心棘手啊

[00:34:54] 哎

[00:34:54] 我说原本那个奇门遁甲

[00:34:56] 我记得之前很久就有一部叫奇门遁甲的电影了

[00:35:00] 就那部电影我觉得还不错呀

[00:35:02] 怎么又是2017年的新作

[00:35:03] 你说的那个奇门遁甲是1982年八爷袁隆平

[00:35:08] 袁隆平种植水稻了

[00:35:10] 我告诉你

[00:35:10] 这样得罪八爷

[00:35:11] 982 年八爷星途一片

[00:35:13] 按袁和平

[00:35:15] 袁和平的作品

[00:35:17] 现在拿出来看

[00:35:18] 还是觉得很有意思啊

[00:35:20] 当时啊

[00:35:20] 虽然说技术比较落后

[00:35:22] 没有出这个现行杂交水稻

[00:35:26] 袁和平作品好了

[00:35:27] 对不起阿姨

[00:35:28] 当时啊

[00:35:29] 虽然

[00:35:29] 说没有数字特效的这些技术

[00:35:31] 但是香港电影人丰富的想象力和表现力啊

[00:35:35] 还是让这部作品妙趣横生

[00:35:38] 来给大家科普一下

[00:35:39] 如果你没有看过的话

[00:35:41] 奇门遁甲呢是一本古老的术数经典

[00:35:44] 里面包含了千百年来劳动人民积累下来的生活经验

[00:35:49] 包括说什么天文地理啊

[00:35:51] 战争谋略啊等等各种学问

[00:35:54] 原作里的奇门遁甲抓住了齐、贺、巧这两个关键词

[00:35:58] 用非常真实的实物道具为大家营造了一个非常玄妙的世界

[00:36:04] 不过现在的电视电影啊

[00:36:05] 也确实是

[00:36:06] 就是一直在滥用特效

[00:36:08] 你比如说赵丽颖连吃个包子都要把包子做成特效包子

[00:36:12] 他是害怕什么呢

[00:36:13] 有道具了不起啊

[00:36:14] 哎呀

[00:36:15] 道具组

[00:36:16] 你们回家过年了吗

[00:36:17] 没有错

[00:36:18] 星座奇门遁甲也是搞错了

[00:36:20] 重点把这个特效变成了一种炫技的手段

[00:36:24] 感觉就是在告诉全世界

[00:36:26] 你看老子的特效有多逼真有多牛逼啊

[00:36:29] 但是我们我们普通观众的观影体验就是场面宏大

[00:36:35] 却空洞无物

[00:36:36] 让人完全没有记忆点

[00:36:38] 这情节性也比较堪忧啊

[00:36:40] 几个月过去了

[00:36:41] 是不是我脑子不太好

[00:36:42] 我也不记得什么情节了

[00:36:43] 看完变形金刚也这样

[00:36:44] 哼

[00:36:45] 我只记得周冬雨小姐动不动就变成一只蓝猫大孔雀

[00:36:48] 逮谁都吃

[00:36:49] 然后柳岩是一个八爪的性感腰精

[00:36:53] 还有那个李治廷腿断了还能再生

[00:36:56] 其实这样一说

[00:36:57] 感觉他们这些特技组团去演西游记或者X战警就会比较合适

[00:37:03] 对啊

[00:37:04] 还有最后的这个boss 决战

[00:37:06] 居然居然他妈是三个特效人物在天上满场飞人就负责坐在地上就刮手啊

[00:37:13] 磕瓜子啊

[00:37:15] 就全程打扣加油

[00:37:16] 我想主角们应该也没有想到

[00:37:19] 最最最最的重头戏这么轻易就演过去了吧

[00:37:23] 磕磕瓜子喝喝茶

[00:37:24] 哎就拍完了

[00:37:26] 没想到拍完了

[00:37:27] 而且告诉大家一个更

[00:37:29] 好的消息

[00:37:30] 这部电影还有续集哦

[00:37:32] 嗯

[00:37:32] 意不意外

[00:37:33] 惊不惊喜

[00:37:34] 开不开心高不高兴

[00:37:35] A

[00:37:36] 打住打住打住

[00:37:36] 我们今天的这个一七年国产烂片总结

[00:37:39] 我们不包括这部电影的细节

[00:37:41] 因为他没拍出来

[00:37:42] 到这儿呢

[00:37:43] 也就先告一段落了

[00:37:45] 如果你错过了我们之前吐槽的其他的国产十大烂片

[00:37:49] 那么请关注重播的节目

[00:37:51] 回去再听一下

[00:37:52] 那吐槽完了之后

[00:37:53] 我们就来听一首breath 的ri mix 版本

[00:37:56] 听完之后我们就进入这个听众吐槽问答环节H

[00:37:59] 对了对了

[00:37:59] 如果你喜欢我们电台的内容

[00:38:01] 不要忘记右下角

[00:38:02] 继续给我们点小草莓

[00:38:10] The extent to him up bad

[00:38:14] I said you started living in my head a cent res and a merely

[00:39:35] Here are just a b a magic pill

[00:41:41] 又到了我们万众期待的吐槽问答精选环节今天我们这个问题啊灵感是来自于我的一个闺蜜小区里面炸开来的一个消息就是一个不太熟的朋友到了我一个闺蜜吃烤肉的图片发了朋友圈却忘记屏蔽了我闺蜜就大型尴尬现场了是不是

[00:41:59] 所以说啊

[00:42:00] 接下来的问题就是你有见过朋友圈多么惨烈的装逼失败现场接下来呢

[00:42:06] 我何必套给大家念几条留言精选有一个女生

[00:42:11] 每逢节日啊他必晒礼物玫瑰花居多

[00:42:14] 礼盒也很多

[00:42:15] 别人都以为追求她的男生也特别多

[00:42:17] 她也美美制造这种误会实际呢

[00:42:20] 都是他向别人索要的内脸皮厚的就像城墙的那个拐角一样

[00:42:25] 我问那些男生是不是喜欢他都异口同声说屁呀

[00:42:28] 老子就是被逼的让我帮他订花

[00:42:30] 然后还不还钱

[00:42:31] 还有啊

[00:42:32] 说去超市

[00:42:33] 非说没带钱

[00:42:33] 先付了

[00:42:34] 到时候再还我毕业刚上班的时候

[00:42:37] 隔壁桌的妹子把他朋友圈打开

[00:42:40] 点开一张照片给我看

[00:42:41] 是她男朋友

[00:42:42] 结果我一看

[00:42:43] 嗯

[00:42:44] 这不是木村拓哉马朋友圈一个女生去芝加哥旅游

[00:42:48] 其实早就已经回来了大概去了五天

[00:42:51] 但囤了一堆的图

[00:42:52] 营造了一种去了十多天的感觉

[00:42:54] 以上是她当时的男朋友告诉我的

[00:42:57] 一个老同学

[00:42:58] 朋友圈晒的各种纸醉金迷

[00:43:00] 各种名媛爬高大上豪车名牌

[00:43:03] 其实都是借了几万块贷款买的A货晒家里别墅

[00:43:07] 钢琴吃饭

[00:43:08] 餐桌什么的全都是盗来的图

[00:43:11] 最搞笑的是他看到跑车什么的时候

[00:43:14] 总是像维密超模一样坐在人家车前盖

[00:43:17] 让旁边的人给他拍照

[00:43:19] 然后发朋友圈

[00:43:20] 结局呢

[00:43:21] 是他现在高利贷滚到了30万

[00:43:23] 已经退学躲去别的地方啦

[00:43:26] 同学男在空间发了自拍

[00:43:27] 却王了换小号

[00:43:29] 自己在下面回复哦

[00:43:30] 小哥哥好帅哦

[00:43:32] 你们的朋友圈戏精都好多

[00:43:34] 我朋友圈没什么戏精

[00:43:36] 但是看到有个同学发自拍这个瓷砖的线

[00:43:40] 调都是歪的

[00:43:41] 不止一次了

[00:43:42] 想提醒又不敢提醒

[00:43:43] 怕拉黑呀

[00:43:44] 曾经有个特别爱慕虚荣又自卑的朋友

[00:43:47] 总怕别人懂的他不懂

[00:43:48] 一次谈到日本料理

[00:43:50] 我问

[00:43:50] 你知道天妇罗吗

[00:43:52] 他特别自信的说

[00:43:53] 知道我吃过那种海螺

[00:43:55] 不管怎么说啊

[00:43:56] 我们刚刚说的这些留言都是靠包装获得的安全感

[00:44:00] 总会有被卸下面具的一天

[00:44:03] 这你装的累

[00:44:04] 看你装的人也累

[00:44:05] 你说是不是

[00:44:05] 对啊

[00:44:06] 所以说啊

[00:44:06] 下面为这些朋友圈的装逼犯们点上一首

[00:44:10] 薛之谦的演员该配合你演出的

[00:44:13] 我也是er 不见

[00:44:16] 那时间呢

[00:44:17] 过得也很快乐

[00:44:18] 又到了我们今天的Vegas 吐槽专栏全部结束的时间了

[00:44:22] 不要忘记啊

[00:44:23] 下周二同一时间

[00:44:24] 晚上七点准时收听

[00:44:25] 我们的下一期节目

[00:44:27] 拜拜

[00:44:43] 简单天

[00:44:47] 说话的方式简单点

[00:44:52] 递进的情绪请省略

[00:44:56] 你又不是个演员

[00:44:58] 别设计那些情节

[00:45:04] 每一天

[00:45:08] 我只想看看你怎么也

[00:45:13] 你难过的太表面

[00:45:17] 像没天赋的演员

[00:45:19] 观众一眼能看见

[00:45:24] 该配合你演出的无影视而不见

[00:45:30] 再给一个最爱你的人比心表演

[00:45:35] 什么时候我们开始收起了底线

[00:45:40] 顺应时代的改变

[00:45:42] 看那些拙劣的表演

[00:45:45] 可你曾经那么爱我干嘛

[00:45:48] 演出细节

[00:45:51] 我该变成什么样子才能灵魂厌倦

[00:45:56] 原来当爱放下防备后的这些

[00:45:59] 那些才是考验

[00:46:07] 每一间

[00:46:11] 你想怎样我都随便

[00:46:17] 你运气也有限

[00:46:19] 又不用说

[00:46:21] 感言分朋友听了些

[00:46:27] 可配合你演出的我演视而不见

[00:46:33] 别逼一个最爱的人一心撩眼

[00:46:38] 什么时候我们开始没有了底线

[00:46:43] 顺着别人的谎言被动

[00:46:46] 就不显得可怜

[00:46:48] 可你曾经那么爱我干嘛

[00:46:51] 演出细节我该变成什么样子才能配合出演

[00:46:59] 原来当爱放下防备后的这些那些

[00:47:04] 都由于期限

[00:47:10] 其实台下的观众就我一个

[00:47:15] 其实我也看出你有点不舍

[00:47:20] 曾经也习惯我们来回拉扯

[00:47:25] 还计较着什么

[00:47:31] 其实说分不开的也不见得

[00:47:36] 其实感情最怕的就是挫折

[00:47:41] 越演到终场

[00:47:43] 喜悦顾不住了

[00:47:46] 是否还值得该配合你演出的

[00:47:53] 我尽力在表演

[00:47:56] 像情感节目里的嘉宾任人挑选

[00:48:02] 如果还能看出我有爱你的那边

[00:48:07] 请剪掉那些情节

[00:48:09] 让我看上去体面

[00:48:12] 可你曾经那么爱我干嘛

[00:48:15] 演出细节不在意的样子

[00:48:19] 是我最好的表演

[00:48:23] 是因为爱你

[00:48:25] 我才选择表演这种成全

[00:48:31] 嗯

[00:49:10] 梦里听到你的低诉

[00:49:14] 要为我遮风霜雨露

[00:49:18] 梦里听到你的呼唤

[00:49:22] 要为我阻碍的工厂

[00:49:25] 一区一区一闪一闪

[00:49:29] 诉说着地老和天荒

[00:49:33] 一丝一丝疑虑

[00:49:35] 疑虑诉说着地久和天长

[00:49:43] 梦里看到你的眼光闪耀着无尽的期望

[00:49:51] 梦里看到你的泪光

[00:49:55] 凝聚着无尽的痴狂

[00:49:58] 一区一区

[00:50:00] 一闪一闪

[00:50:02] 诉说着地老和天荒

[00:50:06] 一丝一丝疑虑

[00:50:10] 诉说着地久和天长

[00:50:15] 俄乌天苍苍

[00:50:18] Ou 地茫茫

[00:50:21] 你是我永恒的阳光

[00:50:25] 山不能天地任

[00:50:28] 你是我永久的天堂

[00:50:32] 落屋天苍苍

[00:50:34] 落屋地茫茫

[00:50:36] 你是我永恒的阳光

[00:50:40] 善无能

[00:50:42] 天地合

[00:50:44] 你是我永久的天堂

[00:50:51] 哇

[00:50:53] 偶言

[00:50:58] 啊

[00:51:04] 梦里看到你的眼光闪耀着无尽的凄惶

[00:51:12] 梦里看透你的泪光

[00:51:16] 凝聚着无尽的痴狂

[00:51:19] 一句一句

[00:51:21] 一生一瞬

[00:51:23] 诉说着地老和天荒

[00:51:27] 一丝一丝音律

[00:51:31] 诉说着地久和天长

[00:52:06] 如果ou 天苍苍

[00:52:09] Ou 地茫茫

[00:52:11] 你是我永恒的阳光

[00:52:15] 山湖满天地合

[00:52:18] 你是我心中的天堂喔

[00:52:23] 天苍苍

[00:52:24] Ou 茫茫

[00:52:27] 你是我永恒的眼光相

[00:52:31] 无人天地

[00:52:34] 任你是我永久的天堂

[00:52:46] 你是我永久的天堂

[00:52:59] 嗯

[00:52:59] 嗯

[00:53:07] 额

[00:53:09] 嗯

[00:53:10] 嗯

[00:53:13] 吃完这份加餐

[00:53:15] 看完这份再出去走走

[00:53:21] 离开这座小城

[00:53:23] 就在光回忆的路口

[00:53:28] 落马

[00:53:29] 在等候那些没能抗拒的时候

[00:53:36] 我想要听过那首轻柔厚重的双手

[00:53:45] Hen Hao Mei I must own for fear

[00:53:54] Har ro ha miles stone for here

[00:54:01] 让我撕心裂肺

[00:54:03] 或许忘了缠绵不同

[00:54:09] 也会伤心难过

[00:54:12] 不粘什么却不爽

[00:54:17] 能否再重逢写信

[00:54:20] 你温柔的感受

[00:54:25] 我知道你会用刀轻吻抚摸我的脆弱

[00:54:34] Ho ho my on cell phone

[00:54:42] 哼哼哼

[00:54:50] 哈哈

[00:54:53] 腾讯音乐天琴实验室的小耳朵们

[00:54:55] 你们好

[00:54:55] 从现在开始呢

[00:54:56] 歪果电台就要长住腾讯音乐天琴实验室啦

[00:54:59] 至于不知道歪果电台的朋友们呢

[00:55:01] 在这里给大家安利一下歪果电台

[00:55:04] 致力于为北美华人打造北美生活文化的分享平台

[00:55:08] 以故事和音乐相结合的方式展示北美华人的生活

[00:55:12] 无论你在北美的哪一个角落

[00:55:14] 总会有人陪你一起听故事听音乐

[00:55:18] 如果大家在这里还没有听够

[00:55:20] 欢迎搜索外国电台微信小程序外国Vigo 1起来收听外国最新的节目

[00:55:28] 大家还可以关注外国V 购公众号

[00:55:30] 与主播互动

[00:55:31] 给身边的朋友点歌或者给我们投稿

[00:55:34] 这里是歪果电台

[00:55:35] 用故事听音乐

[00:55:37] 让北美灵魂不再孤单