《水浒0011》歌词

[00:00:00] 本字幕由腾讯音乐天琴实验室独家AI字幕技术生成

[00:00:01] 花和尚鲁智深贪酒过量啊

[00:00:07] 现在就像个疯子

[00:00:09] 差不多少公开

[00:00:11] V 被五台山文殊院的佛归酒气熏人

[00:00:17] 离了歪斜的满嘴里哇啦

[00:00:20] 也不知说些什么玩意儿

[00:00:22] 这就要进山门

[00:00:24] 人家把门的和尚能让他进吗

[00:00:27] 按照文殊院的规矩

[00:00:29] 和尚偷着喝酒就得打

[00:00:34] 人家把猪账拿出来

[00:00:36] 把鲁智深给拦住

[00:00:38] 断喝一声

[00:00:40] A 鲁智深

[00:00:42] 你好大的胆子

[00:00:44] 你竟敢吃酒带醉

[00:00:46] 这还了得吗

[00:00:48] 休走

[00:00:48] 找打

[00:00:49] J 2 位也不值得深浅

[00:00:52] 他们也不知道

[00:00:53] 鲁智深地底今儿个可捅了篓子了

[00:00:57] 鲁智深一个没注意

[00:01:00] 挨了一个驻扎正宵的后背上

[00:01:03] 那玩意儿挺疼啊

[00:01:05] 这家伙都打击了

[00:01:07] 哇呀哈哈哈

[00:01:11] 好突然呀

[00:01:13] 你们敢打我

[00:01:15] 其实他本身也是个秃子

[00:01:17] 骂别人还是秃驴

[00:01:20] 伸手把竹杖抢过来往磕膝盖上一遍噶吧

[00:01:25] 把主站给掰折

[00:01:28] 挥手一拳正打在小河上

[00:01:31] 后背上

[00:01:31] 把小和尚打得嗷的一声

[00:01:34] 从山门外边儿打到里边去了

[00:01:37] 那个小和尚见识不好

[00:01:39] 浑身就跑

[00:01:41] 就这样

[00:01:42] 鲁智深迈大步进了山门

[00:01:45] 嗯嗯

[00:01:48] 好久啊好久啊

[00:01:52] 到这块儿风一吹

[00:01:55] 他觉着胸膛里头一闹腾

[00:01:58] 哇

[00:01:58] 一声吐J 加土这个臭劲儿就甭提了院儿里边儿

[00:02:05] 出来进去竟是和尚

[00:02:07] 见此情景

[00:02:09] 焉有不气之理

[00:02:12] 有人急忙禀报了间四间四一看啊弥陀佛

[00:02:23] 佛都念不出来了

[00:02:26] 马上聚众三四十人各拿条手棒子把鲁智深给包围了

[00:02:35] 尖刺就恨他打给我打

[00:02:38] 教育教育这个野东西

[00:02:42] 他是什么和尚

[00:02:43] 他纯粹是个花和尚

[00:02:45] 哎

[00:02:46] 打这之后

[00:02:48] J 绰号传开了

[00:02:50] 花和尚鲁智深就这么得来的名儿

[00:02:55] 漫说

[00:02:56] 三四十人呢

[00:02:57] 再多一倍

[00:02:59] 也治不服他

[00:03:01] 鲁智深一开什么你们想要给老虎旅胡子来吧

[00:03:11] 晒甲金谷发懒正好拿你们练刀练刀

[00:03:17] 一转圈就倒

[00:03:19] 一天就听见哎哟铺哎哟

[00:03:22] 哎哟互动互动

[00:03:26] 把这些和尚打得四散奔逃啊

[00:03:31] 鲁智深哈哈大笑

[00:03:34] 你别看醉成这样儿了啊

[00:03:36] 到他还认得

[00:03:38] 晃晃悠悠回到她住那地方去

[00:03:42] 咱没说吗

[00:03:43] 这是练坐禅

[00:03:45] DD 100 多盒上

[00:03:48] 人家照常都在练功

[00:03:51] 屋里头素素静静的

[00:03:53] 她咣一下进来了

[00:03:55] 哇

[00:03:58] 一进门儿就吐了一地

[00:04:01] 把这些和尚惊得把眼全睁开了

[00:04:04] 弥陀佛不怕丑

[00:04:07] 全把鼻子堵上

[00:04:09] 领班的大和尚一看

[00:04:11] 这还了得赶紧过来

[00:04:15] 鲁智深

[00:04:16] 你

[00:04:17] 你

[00:04:17] 你这要干什么

[00:04:19] 催晒家喝了酒心里难受

[00:04:25] 我要睡觉啊

[00:04:29] 他把大和尚补了到旁边去

[00:04:33] 来到床边是倒头便睡

[00:04:36] 时间不大

[00:04:37] 他睡着了

[00:04:38] 哎哟

[00:04:39] 这家和尚可不干了

[00:04:40] 这屋也没法待

[00:04:42] 太臭了

[00:04:43] 连被打的和尚

[00:04:45] 100来人去找老当家的去了

[00:04:49] 真长老文婷一皱眉

[00:04:52] 善哉善哉

[00:04:54] 罪过罪过呀

[00:04:58] 他现在干什么呢

[00:05:00] 他已经睡了

[00:05:01] 让他睡吧

[00:05:04] 酒醒之后

[00:05:06] 把他叫来

[00:05:07] 我要开导于他

[00:05:10] 这些手作间四不服气儿老当家的

[00:05:15] 您是不是对他太有点偏爱

[00:05:18] 您都有点溺爱不明了

[00:05:22] 这就是把他惯的

[00:05:23] 要不惯的哪有

[00:05:25] 今天而当休得多说

[00:05:29] 当初我就说过

[00:05:32] 只顾剃度于他

[00:05:35] 此人心地善良

[00:05:37] 秉性刚直

[00:05:40] 虽然时下凶顽

[00:05:42] 命中驳杂

[00:05:44] 酒后却得清净

[00:05:48] 正果非凡

[00:05:50] 汝等不急也

[00:05:53] 大伙儿一听就来了

[00:05:55] He j 老当家的可气

[00:05:57] 不把这鲁智深捧上了天

[00:06:00] 我们这么老多人都赶不上他

[00:06:04] 这诚心谈后台

[00:06:06] 大伙儿愤愤不服

[00:06:09] 等到第二天

[00:06:11] 小和尚来了

[00:06:13] 鲁智深醒醒醒醒鲁智深醒醒和鲁智深

[00:06:18] 这觉睡得香啊

[00:06:19] 听得耳边呼唤

[00:06:22] 揉揉眼睛就翻身坐起来了

[00:06:25] 哎呀

[00:06:26] 好帅呀好帅

[00:06:29] 什么事儿

[00:06:30] 开饭了你就惦记吃

[00:06:33] 老方丈找你问话

[00:06:36] 就见鲁智深啊一个箭步窜出去了

[00:06:39] 大伙儿一看

[00:06:40] 还是老当家的好时候呢

[00:06:43] 你看看

[00:06:43] 他比兔子跑得快

[00:06:45] 哪知道他一转身奔后边儿**去了

[00:06:49] 憋的等拉完了净完手

[00:06:54] 把衣服规整规整

[00:06:56] 这才来到方丈

[00:06:59] 可这阵儿他酒醒了

[00:07:00] 也知道自己犯了大错

[00:07:02] 而这个鲁智深这人最讲道理

[00:07:05] 不过你别看喝醉了酒耍疯

[00:07:08] 现在他明白了

[00:07:10] 深感内疚哇

[00:07:12] 规规矩矩往百变上衣贵

[00:07:17] 师父在上

[00:07:19] 弟子鲁智深参拜老师

[00:07:24] 阿弥陀佛之身哪

[00:07:29] 你知道你犯了什么过错了

[00:07:32] 不

[00:07:33] 弟子知道

[00:07:35] 我为犯了五戒的第四届不要贪杯食荤

[00:07:42] 我喝酒了

[00:07:44] 哎

[00:07:46] 你明明知道败坏了佛门的规矩

[00:07:52] 为什么明知故犯呢

[00:07:55] 师傅容弟子回禀我呀

[00:07:59] 嗜酒如命

[00:08:01] 多日不喝酒

[00:08:03] 把我馋坏了

[00:08:05] 实在有点儿抑制不住了

[00:08:08] 故此我才喝了酒

[00:08:10] 喝完酒我耍疯

[00:08:12] 闯下大祸

[00:08:14] 师傅您处置我打骂啊

[00:08:18] 干什么都行

[00:08:20] 老方丈一看这人蛮讲道理

[00:08:23] 也罢

[00:08:24] 只差灭你出发

[00:08:29] 看在赵施主的份上也就算了

[00:08:34] 下不为例

[00:08:36] 再不准时集邮

[00:08:39] 你记住了吗

[00:08:41] 弟子不敢

[00:08:42] 弟子不敢

[00:08:45] 好吧

[00:08:46] 你留下来

[00:08:48] 来人

[00:08:49] 准备早膳

[00:08:52] 你看看

[00:08:53] 老方丈不但没处罚他

[00:08:56] 还准备丰盛的早饭

[00:08:59] 两个人共进早餐

[00:09:02] 把那些合成气的鼻子都歪了

[00:09:05] 其实这J 老当家的糊涂了

[00:09:08] 嘿

[00:09:09] 你要这么惯他

[00:09:10] 往后他更眼里没人了

[00:09:13] 大伙儿是干鼓肚梅州呢

[00:09:16] 其实老方丈啊

[00:09:17] 的确对她偏爱

[00:09:21] 你得看鲁智深那样

[00:09:24] 老和尚从心里往外喜欢他

[00:09:27] 他说的真不假

[00:09:29] 他看出来了

[00:09:30] 鲁智深这人口快

[00:09:32] 心知

[00:09:33] 心地善良

[00:09:36] 尤其他看中的是

[00:09:39] 你照潭月照

[00:09:40] 施主那有钱呐

[00:09:43] 这是赵施主

[00:09:44] D 表弟要把鲁智深给得罪了

[00:09:48] 不是把财神爷给得罪了

[00:09:51] 那对文殊院的损失也太大了

[00:09:54] 哎

[00:09:55] 多方面的原因吧

[00:09:58] 所以他老袒护乳达

[00:10:01] 今儿个吃早饭的时候

[00:10:02] 一边吃老当家的

[00:10:05] 一边给他讲道理

[00:10:07] 就得循循善诱

[00:10:09] 鲁智深一边听着一边点头

[00:10:13] 两个时辰之后

[00:10:14] 饭也吃完了

[00:10:16] 这话也讲完了

[00:10:18] 老方丈笑笑呵呵

[00:10:20] 地址山

[00:10:21] 那去吧

[00:10:23] 往后千万不要破坏佛门的规矩了

[00:10:27] 弟子再也不敢了

[00:10:30] 鲁智深回去了

[00:10:32] 心说

[00:10:32] 哎

[00:10:33] 这老和尚还真不错

[00:10:36] 对我蛮够意思

[00:10:39] 我以为把我找去啦

[00:10:41] 不定你怎么处罚我呢

[00:10:44] 不但没说

[00:10:45] 旁的还请我吃顿饭

[00:10:49] 她低下头

[00:10:50] 回味回味

[00:10:52] 觉着老师傅说那些道理都是对的

[00:10:56] 怪就怪我自己

[00:10:58] 我怎么那么馋

[00:11:01] 我就没有决心改了吗

[00:11:04] 从今以后

[00:11:05] 我再也不要贪杯

[00:11:08] 甚至连想也不要想多的

[00:11:11] 要想喝酒

[00:11:12] 我就掐我自己的大腿

[00:11:16] 诉说简短

[00:11:17] 五个月

[00:11:18] 鲁智深没犯错误

[00:11:21] 哎

[00:11:21] 挺守规矩

[00:11:22] 和尚没开还行啊

[00:11:25] 老当家的找他谈次话还挺有效率

[00:11:29] 要照这样下去

[00:11:32] 还算个和尚

[00:11:34] 转眼之间

[00:11:35] 到了第二年春天

[00:11:37] 春暖花开

[00:11:39] 万物复苏

[00:11:41] 是大好的季节呀

[00:11:44] 这天

[00:11:45] 鲁智深没事儿来到山门外边儿

[00:11:50] 吸了几口新鲜的空气

[00:11:53] 看了看寺外的风景

[00:11:56] 哎呀

[00:11:56] 真是风景如画

[00:11:59] 鲁智深屈指一算

[00:12:02] 上山快一年了

[00:12:05] 哎呀

[00:12:06] 什么时候是我出头之日

[00:12:11] 难道我这一辈子就在这儿当和尚吗

[00:12:15] 要那样

[00:12:16] 我也太有点窝囊了

[00:12:19] 哎

[00:12:22] 他心里头又胡思乱想开了

[00:12:25] 哎

[00:12:25] 正在这时候

[00:12:27] 他听着远处有打铁的生

[00:12:32] 叮叮当当

[00:12:33] 叮叮当当

[00:12:34] 叮叮当当

[00:12:34] 叮叮

[00:12:36] 听了听还挺远

[00:12:38] 有时候这方啊

[00:12:40] 把这声音给飘来了

[00:12:42] 鲁智深异响

[00:12:44] 哪有

[00:12:45] 铁匠炉啊

[00:12:47] 我这儿还攒了不少银子

[00:12:50] 怎么办呢

[00:12:51] 我让他给你打一条铁禅杖

[00:12:55] 没事儿做练功用的

[00:12:57] 对我去看看

[00:13:00] 他顺着声音

[00:13:01] 它就下了山了

[00:13:03] 哎哟

[00:13:04] 一走就是十几里呀

[00:13:06] 你说在山顶怎么听那么镇

[00:13:09] 等来到山脚下一看

[00:13:11] 闹了半天

[00:13:12] 是一座小镇店

[00:13:15] 虽然只有一条街

[00:13:17] 还挺热闹

[00:13:18] 做买的做卖的

[00:13:20] 车来人往红蓝绿与

[00:13:24] 让人目不暇接呀

[00:13:27] 花和尚鲁智深一看高了兴J 半年来的

[00:13:32] 连门儿都没出过

[00:13:34] 这回我得好好溜达溜达

[00:13:36] 他东撒摸撒摸西看一看

[00:13:39] 穿街而过

[00:13:41] 哎

[00:13:41] 真找着那家铁匠炉了

[00:13:44] 三间门脸

[00:13:46] 旁边有个大院儿之志鹏

[00:13:49] 炉子通红的

[00:13:52] 里边儿好几个伙计

[00:13:54] 涨钱的涨钱儿

[00:13:55] 轮锤的轮锤

[00:13:58] 鲁智深被手一看

[00:14:01] 又打了不少半成品

[00:14:03] 都在那摆着

[00:14:05] 多数啊

[00:14:06] 都是农具

[00:14:08] 只有几样是刀枪

[00:14:11] 看那样打得还不错

[00:14:13] 他正看着呢

[00:14:15] 有个伙计一抬头

[00:14:17] 冲他一乐

[00:14:19] 是吧

[00:14:20] 你有事儿吗

[00:14:21] 阿弥陀佛

[00:14:23] 我想打造一条禅杖

[00:14:27] 你们接活不接活

[00:14:29] 哎

[00:14:30] 师傅请进来吧

[00:14:30] 请进来

[00:14:32] 答什么

[00:14:33] 我们都能达把她让进来

[00:14:35] 搬把椅子

[00:14:36] 他坐起来

[00:14:37] 这伙计是个负责的

[00:14:39] 就问

[00:14:41] 师傅在哪出家

[00:14:42] 五台山文殊院

[00:14:45] He

[00:14:46] 咱们都是邻居

[00:14:48] 实不相瞒呢

[00:14:51] 我们的一切一切全仰仗着保山呢

[00:14:56] 请问师父

[00:14:57] 您要打一条什么样的残障

[00:15:00] 有图纸吗

[00:15:03] 什么叫图纸

[00:15:04] 就是涂鸦

[00:15:06] 鲁智深一波脑袋没有

[00:15:09] 反正你们手艺好

[00:15:11] 你们想给打什么残障就打什么

[00:15:15] 只要港口儿好就行

[00:15:18] 那好嘞

[00:15:19] 您放心大胆交给我们

[00:15:21] 准保样式新颖

[00:15:24] 您使着是得心应手

[00:15:28] 那好

[00:15:30] 刀你们打不打打呀

[00:15:32] 你没开这有好几把

[00:15:33] 这这我不要

[00:15:35] 我要带鞘的刀

[00:15:38] 就叫戒刀吧

[00:15:40] 分量要加重一些行

[00:15:44] 要那样

[00:15:45] 给您打造一把后背

[00:15:48] 坚持雁翎刀

[00:15:51] 您看怎么样

[00:15:53] 比别的刀加重四两

[00:15:56] 呃

[00:15:56] 不行不行

[00:15:57] 轻轻轻轻

[00:15:59] 要比别的刀重上一倍

[00:16:02] 嗨

[00:16:03] 这颗新鲜

[00:16:04] 那您能拿得动啊

[00:16:06] 那玩屎

[00:16:06] 这可压手腕

[00:16:08] A 越重越好

[00:16:11] 那您的禅杖

[00:16:13] 准备要多少斤的呃

[00:16:17] 100斤

[00:16:19] 你看怎么样

[00:16:20] 伙计一听吓的缩脖

[00:16:23] 我师父

[00:16:24] 您别开玩笑了

[00:16:26] 哪有使那么重的

[00:16:29] 那是说书讲古

[00:16:32] 要是真的话

[00:16:33] 没有就是关王刀

[00:16:37] 那是举世无双的

[00:16:39] 只有81斤

[00:16:42] 那是祖宗啦

[00:16:45] 哪有打100斤的na

[00:16:50] 我不敢跟官方也比

[00:16:52] 那就打80 斤的吧

[00:16:55] 80 斤也重点儿

[00:16:58] 师傅

[00:16:59] 我给您出个主意

[00:17:01] 干脆我给您打造一条62 斤

[00:17:06] 那就够重的

[00:17:09] 可是打完之后

[00:17:10] 您别嫌沉呐

[00:17:12] 要废了可不行

[00:17:13] 你还得照样付钱

[00:17:15] 好啦

[00:17:17] 就依你打造一条62 斤重的禅杖

[00:17:23] 样式一定要好

[00:17:25] 您包给我们了

[00:17:26] 您要不满意

[00:17:28] 您甭给钱

[00:17:29] 您看好不好

[00:17:30] 我们如数把银子退给你

[00:17:33] 一言为定

[00:17:35] 打造这两样需要多少钱呢

[00:17:38] 不多

[00:17:38] 您给五两白银

[00:17:41] 可真不贵

[00:17:43] 先付钱

[00:17:45] 鲁智深从怀里拿出五两银子给了火情

[00:17:49] 问伙计什么时候来取货

[00:17:52] 伙计说快

[00:17:53] 三天之后您还这时候来

[00:17:56] 我们指定就打造完了

[00:17:59] 投完了

[00:18:00] 到时候我要满意

[00:18:02] 必定重重给你赏钱

[00:18:04] 好的

[00:18:05] 师傅

[00:18:06] 我手里有活儿

[00:18:07] 不陪您啦

[00:18:08] 您乐意看您就歇会儿

[00:18:10] 不乐意看有事儿您办事儿去

[00:18:12] 杀一家告辞

[00:18:14] A 鲁智深挺高兴

[00:18:17] 从铁匠炉出来

[00:18:19] 兴致正浓

[00:18:22] 还接茬儿溜达

[00:18:24] 旁边就是酒馆

[00:18:27] 鲁智深一踢鼻子

[00:18:30] 哎呀

[00:18:31] 又想喝酒了

[00:18:35] 一想

[00:18:36] 我已经发了誓

[00:18:37] 不喝酒啊

[00:18:39] 我怎么这馋虫又上来了

[00:18:42] 真他娘的没出息

[00:18:45] 就这样啊

[00:18:46] 偷偷的掐了自己大腿里子一下啊

[00:18:50] 掐的还真疼

[00:18:53] 他打了个激灵

[00:18:55] 平胸从酒馆儿先不过去不喝

[00:19:00] 看看我自己

[00:19:01] 能管住我自己不

[00:19:04] 没走几步

[00:19:06] 又一家酒馆

[00:19:09] 哎

[00:19:09] 这家的酒坛子还没盖

[00:19:12] 风珍一飘啊

[00:19:13] 哎

[00:19:14] 这个九位

[00:19:15] 这个诱人呢

[00:19:18] 嗯

[00:19:20] 他娘的

[00:19:21] 怎么这么多卖9 D

[00:19:24] 偏在我鼻子底下卖酒

[00:19:27] 这真叫人难受

[00:19:31] 不喝

[00:19:33] 他又掐了自己一下

[00:19:36] 哪知道这都是自欺欺人地招儿

[00:19:40] 哎呀

[00:19:40] 往前没走了几步

[00:19:43] 他自己管不住自己

[00:19:46] 这馋虫啊

[00:19:47] 顺着嗓子眼往上爬

[00:19:50] 这不是他闹心呢

[00:19:53] 哎呀

[00:19:55] 机会难得呀

[00:19:59] 不然的化

[00:20:00] 我再开一回荤

[00:20:04] 在解一回馋

[00:20:06] 这回喝完了

[00:20:08] 下半辈儿是滴酒不沾

[00:20:12] 就这一回

[00:20:14] 还不多喝

[00:20:17] 适可而止

[00:20:19] 千万别捅娄子

[00:20:22] 对

[00:20:22] 少喝点怕啥对不对啊

[00:20:26] 谁也不知道

[00:20:28] 嗯

[00:20:28] 就这一回啊

[00:20:30] 智山那a 记住了啊

[00:20:32] 就这一回

[00:20:33] A 记住了

[00:20:34] 呵

[00:20:34] 自己跟自己还演戏呢

[00:20:37] 卖不

[00:20:38] 他进了酒馆

[00:20:40] 拉把椅子往那儿一坐

[00:20:41] 伙计就愣住了

[00:20:43] 师傅

[00:20:43] 您要干什么

[00:20:45] 拿酒来晒一下

[00:20:48] 要喝酒

[00:20:50] 哼

[00:20:51] 师傅对不起

[00:20:53] J 9 不能卖给您

[00:20:56] 为什么

[00:20:57] 莫非塞加不给钱吗

[00:21:00] 非也

[00:21:01] 跟您这么说

[00:21:04] 我们这个酒馆的本钱是文殊院给拿的

[00:21:09] 文殊院有规矩

[00:21:11] 不准卖给文殊院的和尚喝酒

[00:21:15] 谁要破坏了这个规矩

[00:21:17] 我们这饭碗子也砸了

[00:21:19] 酒馆也开不成了

[00:21:22] 师傅

[00:21:24] 请您千千万万原谅

[00:21:27] 行吧

[00:21:29] 王牌就撵

[00:21:30] 鲁智深脸一红

[00:21:32] 没办法

[00:21:33] 出了酒馆

[00:21:35] A

[00:21:36] 你说真倒霉啊

[00:21:38] 他不卖给我

[00:21:40] 不卖给我我不喝

[00:21:43] 正好儿哪

[00:21:44] 只走了几步

[00:21:46] 抬头一看

[00:21:46] 又一家酒馆

[00:21:48] 他怎么这么多呢

[00:21:50] 再试试

[00:21:52] 进了酒馆

[00:21:53] 掌柜的是个老头儿

[00:21:56] 一个劲儿给他做一

[00:21:58] 师傅

[00:21:58] 千万原谅我们不敢卖给出家人

[00:22:03] 要叫老当家的知道把我们扭送到官府

[00:22:07] 我们吃罪不起呀

[00:22:09] 师傅

[00:22:10] 您赏饭吧

[00:22:11] 您高升一步

[00:22:13] 上别人家去吧

[00:22:15] 书说简短

[00:22:16] 一帘走了六家

[00:22:19] 全碰了壁子

[00:22:22] 鲁智深就琢磨着怎么个毛病

[00:22:26] 他们怎么都说一样的话

[00:22:29] 看来今儿个我白来了

[00:22:32] 一口酒我也喝不着啊

[00:22:35] 后来他乐了

[00:22:36] 哎呀

[00:22:38] 我是个傻子

[00:22:40] 我不行

[00:22:41] 说我不是五台山的和尚

[00:22:44] 我说我是过路的和尚

[00:22:45] 他不就卖给我了吗

[00:22:47] 对

[00:22:49] 试试这招灵不灵

[00:22:52] 就这样

[00:22:53] 鲁智深厚着脸皮

[00:22:55] 迈大步又走进

[00:22:58] 酒馆