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《006学乖》歌词

所属专辑: 刘宝瑞单口相声集 歌手: 容砚 时长: 12:08
006学乖

[00:00:00] 本字幕由天琴实验室独家AI技术生成

[00:00:00] 这回我说一回笑话

[00:00:04] 这个笑话啊

[00:00:05] 是这个傻子的故事

[00:00:09] 那位同志说这傻子这这是怎么回事情啊

[00:00:14] 这人好吧

[00:00:14] 当然他为什么他傻啦

[00:00:17]

[00:00:18] 现在我到研究出一个原因来

[00:00:21] 我说这个傻子呀

[00:00:23] 就是社会造成的

[00:00:26] 怎么呢

[00:00:26] 就社会您看这傻子呀

[00:00:29] 旧社会啊

[00:00:30] 有两种

[00:00:31] 这句中傻呀

[00:00:33] 是什么呀

[00:00:35] 害这个热病吃凉药吃多了

[00:00:38]

[00:00:40] 另外还有一种傻子

[00:00:42] 那是怎么意思

[00:00:43] 那就是

[00:00:45] 培养出来的

[00:00:48] 他说你说这像话吗

[00:00:50] 有有往外培养傻子的他是让他他那旧社会可不就那样吗

[00:00:56] 因为什么呢

[00:00:58] 那个财主啊

[00:00:59] 地主家里头

[00:01:01] 有钱有了小孩儿啊

[00:01:04] 呵呵

[00:01:04] 小少爷

[00:01:07] 这孩子呀

[00:01:07] 从小就是看猫老猫跟猫哄猫四人扶持这么一个孩子

[00:01:16]

[00:01:17] 结果就给扶持傻咯

[00:01:19] 他怎么傻了

[00:01:20] 你想四人照顾这一个孩子

[00:01:22] 这孩子受得了吗

[00:01:25] 茶来张手饭来张口什么也不懂的八岁了

[00:01:29] 还记着P 互联呢

[00:01:32] 十岁大小便得有人管12 岁吃饭还得用人喂呢

[00:01:38] 就这样伺候他吗

[00:01:41] 到吃饭的时候老妈就得叫

[00:01:44] 少爷吃饭啦

[00:01:46]

[00:01:49] 一张嘴等着喂这回头啊

[00:01:52] 连菜汤啊

[00:01:53] 带菜啊

[00:01:53] 办好了老妈的胃

[00:01:55]

[00:01:57] 不喂不喂我都不会吃这天呢

[00:02:00] 老妈子有病老妈子病了

[00:02:03] 找了1 T 工来这替工不懂啊

[00:02:07] 少爷吃饭啦

[00:02:09] 搁在那儿

[00:02:09] 他出去了没味

[00:02:11] 结果饿一天

[00:02:13] 您说那那还不给培养傻咯

[00:02:16] 那他非傻不可

[00:02:19] 今天我说这个就是这么回事情

[00:02:23] 有一家大财主家里头有三个姑娘

[00:02:27] 大姑娘二姑娘三姑娘这三位姑娘啊

[00:02:31] 都出了门子了

[00:02:33] 这个大姑娘啊

[00:02:34] 给了一个秀才

[00:02:37] 二姑娘呢

[00:02:37] 二姑娘给了个举人

[00:02:40] 三姑娘喝三姑娘长得最美丽

[00:02:44] 并且最聪明

[00:02:47] 也寻了个主

[00:02:49] 错不了

[00:02:51] 傻子

[00:02:53] 说这怎么个道理呢

[00:02:55] 怎么会寻了个傻子呢

[00:02:58] 他那是这个父母主婚呢

[00:03:01] 因为这个傻子呀

[00:03:02] 比他们家的财主大他爹呀

[00:03:05] 八七高枝儿得把这个姑娘啊

[00:03:08] 给了个傻子

[00:03:10] 这三姑娘就听说了没过门就听说自己男人是傻子

[00:03:15] 心里头这个堵的哼

[00:03:17] 这个气压啊

[00:03:19] 赶到那儿下了轿啊

[00:03:20] 一看那财主倒是挺大

[00:03:23] 义桥啊

[00:03:24] 拜天地时候真是傻三姑娘哈做的洞房里

[00:03:29] 他就哭

[00:03:31] 死气白赖地哭

[00:03:32] 大伙儿就说是傻子

[00:03:34] 你过去劝劝你过去劝傻子就过去了

[00:03:39]

[00:03:40] 嘻嘻嘻嘻你你你

[00:03:43]

[00:03:43] 你哭什么呀

[00:03:46] 她问了两句三姑娘一生气不能不理他了

[00:03:52] 哭什么呀啊

[00:03:55] 嫁你我算倒了霉了

[00:03:57]

[00:03:59] 怎么辣

[00:04:01] 怎么了

[00:04:03] 你傻

[00:04:04] 你不会说话

[00:04:09] 我不会说话你你你交给我呀

[00:04:14] 三供一想对啊

[00:04:16] 不会说话

[00:04:17] 慢慢教啊

[00:04:20] 我叫个你好

[00:04:22] 甭说别地

[00:04:24] 到了三天头上啊

[00:04:26] 我就得回门到娘家去

[00:04:29] 你也得跟我一块儿去你说你要这么傻你你到了那儿让我大姐二姐大姐夫二姐夫一看

[00:04:38] 我这面子往哪儿搁呀

[00:04:40] 我教你话你能记得住吗

[00:04:43] 嗯你来呀

[00:04:46] 那好

[00:04:46] 我告诉你

[00:04:47] 比如说咱俩要去咯

[00:04:50] 到我店门口儿

[00:04:52] 我爹呀

[00:04:52] 必然出来迎接你我爹要迎接你

[00:04:56] 你你怎么办呢

[00:04:58] 那我我就进去啊

[00:05:02] 进去还行啊

[00:05:04] 你得说话

[00:05:06] 哎我我我说什么呀

[00:05:10] 我爹必然这么说

[00:05:12]

[00:05:12] 三门削你投了请吧

[00:05:15] 你就得这么说

[00:05:16] 你说岳父您投了请吧

[00:05:19] 长者先幼者后小区我来了

[00:05:23] 我应当的

[00:05:25] 你要记得住你就不傻

[00:05:28]

[00:05:29] 这一说呀

[00:05:30] 傻子还真行

[00:05:32] 记住了a 你你

[00:05:34] 你再说一遍

[00:05:36] 我告诉您

[00:05:39] 你说岳父您投了请吧

[00:05:41] 长者先幼者后小区我来了

[00:05:44] 我应当的说说试试

[00:05:47]

[00:05:47]

[00:05:49] 月月付您投了请吧

[00:05:53]

[00:05:54] 这这长者先幼者后一小区我来了我

[00:06:00] 我应当的我

[00:06:02] 我应当的

[00:06:05] 三姑那天干嘛说俩应当的呀

[00:06:08]

[00:06:08] 行既然会了就行了

[00:06:10]

[00:06:11] 对对你就这么说啊

[00:06:13] 感到里头啊磕头的时候

[00:06:15] 我怎么磕你怎么磕少说话一会儿啊

[00:06:20] 就在那儿吃饭到吃饭的时候大姐大姐夫二姐

[00:06:26] 二姐夫他们做的上手

[00:06:29] 听见没有我让你做我坐在哪儿

[00:06:31] 你就在我旁边这么一做

[00:06:33] 别多说话

[00:06:35]

[00:06:36] 等一会儿啊

[00:06:37] 我爸爸必然给你不菜

[00:06:39] 我爸爸要给你不菜你

[00:06:41] 你怎么样呢

[00:06:43] 嗯吃啊

[00:06:45] 我还不知道你吃啥吃是吃你得说话

[00:06:49] 哎我我我说什么呀

[00:06:53] 你就这么说

[00:06:55] 你说岳父您请手小胥我自取我勾着辣就行了aa 玉玉

[00:07:05] 岳父民情手小胥我自取我

[00:07:10] 我够着了我

[00:07:12] 我够着了他最后老说两句

[00:07:16] 三国内平行型

[00:07:19]

[00:07:19] 你可别忘了啊

[00:07:21] 联投的那也记住你要把它念熟了

[00:07:24] 背熟了

[00:07:26]

[00:07:27] 这一让他背熟了

[00:07:29] 呵呵

[00:07:29] 傻子可逮着理了这一天嘴不闲着

[00:07:32] 老说这几句

[00:07:35] 嘿嘿

[00:07:36] 要不您投了井吧

[00:07:37] 长者先幼者后小区我来了

[00:07:41] 我应当的

[00:07:42] 应当的

[00:07:44] 岳父您请手小徐我自取我够着了我够着了

[00:07:51] 小徐我来了

[00:07:52] 我应当的我应当的我够着了我够着了他这一天老说这个吃喝拉撒睡行动坐卧走老说最可气的是什么呢三姑娘走在哪

[00:08:04] 他跟着哪跟着身后的说我我应当的我应当的他老说呀

[00:08:12] 就把这三姑娘说烦了

[00:08:14] 我应当的我应当的三姑娘一着急

[00:08:19] 带着吧

[00:08:21] 呆着吧

[00:08:22] 就不让他说了

[00:08:24] 他怎么样错会意了

[00:08:27] 他以为这句也是交给他的呢

[00:08:30]

[00:08:31] 岳父临头了请吧

[00:08:32] 长者先幼者后

[00:08:33] 小徐我来了

[00:08:34] 我应当我应当的岳父您亲手小旭我自取我够着了我够着了待着吧

[00:08:44] 三姑娘听怎么这句也接上了三姑娘很生气

[00:08:50] 再说我给你个嘴巴闲的讨厌再说

[00:08:54] 我给你个嘴巴

[00:08:56] 他一听三姑娘要打他呢

[00:08:58] 他可就不敢说了

[00:09:00] 虽然不说呀

[00:09:02] 可是这句话他也记住了

[00:09:06] 咱到了第三天啦

[00:09:08] 不真坐着车去了

[00:09:10] 到了岳父那块儿老岳父真迎接出来了

[00:09:13]

[00:09:13] 果然是这句话哦

[00:09:15] 呃三门训你来了啊

[00:09:17] 你投了钱发

[00:09:20] 三姑娘们

[00:09:21] 一旦他袖子

[00:09:22]

[00:09:22] 傻子真不含糊针说上来了

[00:09:25]

[00:09:26] 月月付您

[00:09:28] 您投的情况

[00:09:30]

[00:09:30] 长者先幼走后

[00:09:32] 小许我来了

[00:09:33] 我应当的我

[00:09:34] 我应当的

[00:09:37] 老岳父一听一

[00:09:39] 都说我这三门学是傻子

[00:09:42] 他不傻呀

[00:09:44]

[00:09:44] 老岳父很高兴

[00:09:46] 感到了里头呢

[00:09:47] 磕头的时候

[00:09:48] 他也不多说话

[00:09:49] 嗯没露出破绽来挺好

[00:09:54] 到了吃饭的时候出了事了

[00:09:57] 怎么出事了

[00:09:58] 老岳父岳母啊

[00:09:59] 在当中坐着大姐大姐夫上手二姐二姐夫下手

[00:10:05] 他们在对面

[00:10:07] 都做好了

[00:10:09] 都做好了呢

[00:10:10] 老岳父疼姑爷

[00:10:12] 当然疼小的就加了一桌子菜正给补过去了

[00:10:17] 老岳父一部菜

[00:10:19] 哎哎

[00:10:20] 三门须你吃这个

[00:10:24] 傻子呢

[00:10:24] 真不含糊站起来了

[00:10:26] 月月月月复您轻手一小区

[00:10:30] 我自取我我我够着了

[00:10:33] 呃我我够着了你把那丸子往这么挪三姑

[00:10:39] 你听怎么又多了一句啊

[00:10:41] 干嘛挪挪丸子呀

[00:10:44] 老岳母一听哦

[00:10:48] 三门学爱吃丸子老岳母高兴了哦

[00:10:53] 三姑奶奶爱吃丸子好

[00:10:55] 我给你结

[00:10:56]

[00:10:56] 三门去给你这丸子傻子把内就响起来了

[00:11:01] 你带着吧

[00:11:06] 老岳母吓一跳啊

[00:11:09] 听说我招他惹他了我我这么大岁数好心好意

[00:11:14] 我给你补不猜我呆着吧我

[00:11:17] 我怎么了

[00:11:18] 我带着吧啊

[00:11:19] 你跟我有茶有崽儿啊

[00:11:22] 老太太这么一生气啊

[00:11:25] 大姑娘明白大姑娘站起来了

[00:11:28] 哎哟

[00:11:29] 妈呀

[00:11:29] 您看那什么呀

[00:11:32] A 3 妹夫说这句是好话

[00:11:36] 他大概那个意思是教您歇着吧

[00:11:41] 怕您累着教您歇着吧

[00:11:43] 恒泰啊

[00:11:44] 说错了说让您待着吧

[00:11:46] 他亦是好意

[00:11:47] 他是让您歇着吧

[00:11:49] 既然他让您歇着

[00:11:51] 干脆

[00:11:51] 您就歇着我替您来

[00:11:53]

[00:11:54] 三妹夫你吃这个呀

[00:11:56] 再说我给你个嘴巴

[00:11:57] 我招你了