《Master Of The House》歌词

[00:00:07] Welcome Monsieur sit yourself down

[00:00:10] And meet the best innkeeper in town

[00:00:15] As for the rest all of 'em crooks:

[00:00:18] Rooking their guests and crooking the books

[00:00:24] Seldom do you see

[00:00:27] Honest men like me

[00:00:30] A gent of good intent

[00:00:33] Who's content to be

[00:00:38] Master of the house doling out the charm

[00:00:41] Ready with a handshake and an open palm

[00:00:44] Tells a saucy tale makes a little stir

[00:00:48] Customers appreciate a bon-viveur

[00:00:51] Glad do to a friend a favor

[00:00:55] Doesn't cost me to be nice

[00:00:58] But nothing gets you nothing

[00:00:59] Everything has got a little price

[00:01:04] Master of the house keeper of the zoo

[00:01:08] Ready to relieve 'em of a sou or two

[00:01:11] Watering the wine making up the weight

[00:01:14] Pickin' up their knick-knacks when they can't see straight

[00:01:18] Everybody loves a landlord

[00:01:21] Everybody's bosom friend

[00:01:24] I do whatever pleases

[00:01:26] Jesus Won't I bleed 'em in the end

[00:01:29] Master of the house quick to catch yer eye

[00:01:32] Never wants a passerby to pass him by

[00:01:36] Servant to the poor butler to the great

[00:01:39] Comforter philosopher lifelong and mate

[00:01:42] Everybody's boon companion

[00:01:45] Everybody's chaperone

[00:01:48] But lock up your valises

[00:01:50] Jesus Won't I skin you to the bone

[00:01:57] Enter Monsieur lay down your load

[00:02:00] Unlace your boots rest from the road

[00:02:05] This weighs a ton travel's a curse

[00:02:08] But here we strive to lighten your purse

[00:02:14] Here the goose is cooked

[00:02:17] Here the fat is fried

[00:02:20] And nothing's overlooked

[00:02:23] Till I'm satisfied

[00:02:27] Food beyond compare Food beyond belief

[00:02:30] Mix it in a mincer and pretend it's beef

[00:02:34] Kidney of a horse liver of a cat

[00:02:37] Filling up the sausages with this and that

[00:02:41] Residents are more than welcome

[00:02:44] Bridal suite is occupied

[00:02:47] Reasonable charges

[00:02:49] Plus some little extras on the side

[00:02:54] Charge 'em for the lice extra for the mice

[00:02:57] Two percent for looking in the mirror twice

[00:03:00] Here a little slice there a little cut

[00:03:04] Three percent for sleeping with the window shut

[00:03:07] When it comes to fixing prices

[00:03:10] There are a lot of tricks he knows

[00:03:13] How it all increases all them bits and pieces

[00:03:16] Jesus It's amazing how it grows

[00:03:20] Master of the house quick to catch yer eye

[00:03:23] Never wants a passerby to pass him by

[00:03:26] Servant to the poor butler to the great

[00:03:29] Comforter philosopher and lifelong mate

[00:03:32] Everybody's boon companion

[00:03:35] Gives 'em everything he's got

[00:03:39] Dirty bunch of geezers

[00:03:40] Jesus What a sorry little lot

[00:03:47] I used to dream that I would meet a prince

[00:03:51] But God and Almighty have you seen what's happened since

[00:03:56] Master of the house Isn't worth me spit

[00:04:00] `Comforter philosopher' and lifelong sh*t

[00:04:03] Cunning little brain regular Voltaire

[00:04:06] Thinks he's quite a lover but there's not much there

[00:04:10] What a cruel trick of nature landed me with such a louse

[00:04:16] God knows how I've lasted living with this bastard in the house

[00:04:21] Master of the house

[00:04:23] Master and a half

[00:04:25] Comforter philosopher

[00:04:26] Ah don't make me laugh

[00:04:28] Servant to the poor butler to the great

[00:04:31] Hypocrite and toady and inebriate

[00:04:34] Everybody bless the landlord

[00:04:37] Everybody bless his spouse

[00:04:40] Everybody raise a glass

[00:04:43] Raise it up the master's arse

[00:04:46] Everybody raise a glass to the Master of the House