《第29集_策划_牛群，赵本山，宋丹丹》歌词

[00:00:00] 本字幕由天琴实验室独家AI技术生成

[00:00:08] 到家了

[00:00:10] 儿媳妇

[00:00:11] 咱俩硬菜将来铁了啊

[00:00:14] 哦

[00:00:14] 待会可别喝酒哎

[00:00:17] 你大妈麻烦你了

[00:00:18] 我太想这玩意了

[00:00:21] 你说是你说弄完搁哪播

[00:00:26] 呃

[00:00:27] 在搁地方地方还好啊

[00:00:30] 别搁小推

[00:00:31] 这不不靠谱

[00:00:35] 去年四大哥他那栏目也回来

[00:00:38] 那家一路背的

[00:00:40] 干啥啥赔来咱开队啊

[00:00:44] 哎

[00:00:45] 大妈啊

[00:00:46] 你不把大厨请出来啊

[00:00:47] 不用了

[00:00:48] 昨也行

[00:00:49] 嗯

[00:00:49] 啊

[00:00:50] 老两口在一块那是我要不人家以为俺俩离婚考虑的很全面

[00:01:00] 老婆老公

[00:01:09] 一你了这话叔您好

[00:01:14] 来来

[00:01:16] 再来好了

[00:01:19] 世界这个后是大家熟悉的黑白云啊

[00:01:23] 名年让黑茶两位你得全部天新闻居然下了干

[00:01:32] 你那嘴咋像棉裤腰似的

[00:01:35] 你呢的咋就那么聪呢

[00:01:37] 咋咋的了

[00:01:38] 你说咱家公鸡下蛋这的事咋地了咋的是不是就咱俩知道

[00:01:42] 儿子和儿媳妇都不知道

[00:01:44] 你怎么上这里说来呢

[00:01:46] 不怕啥怕啥

[00:01:48] 咱家长的攻心家当啊

[00:01:51] 这不等于说我怀孕了吗

[00:01:55] 我才不年级

[00:01:56] 我死了啊你啊三了

[00:02:02] 他能发术吓死我一辈子

[00:02:03] 我从本天啊

[00:02:08] 我怕让你笑话

[00:02:10] 哎

[00:02:10] 你大妈呀

[00:02:12] 出事之后出两本书

[00:02:14] 现在欠出本社2万块钱

[00:02:15] 你别你睛账

[00:02:16] 你传票都来了这了

[00:02:19] 大哥忘了

[00:02:20] 得等得等

[00:02:21] 这有2万块钱

[00:02:22] 没关系

[00:02:23] 下嘿

[00:02:24] 我拍这了啊没

[00:02:26] 我他

[00:02:29] 他一这怎么个意思

[00:02:35] 大说啊

[00:02:36] 我不是打算开发这个下葬的公击吗

[00:02:39] 啊

[00:02:40] 这是预付款2万块钱给我们的啊

[00:02:44] 不

[00:02:44] 现在还不属于二老的

[00:02:46] 一会儿我提问题呢

[00:02:47] 你们要配合

[00:02:48] 配合的好

[00:02:49] 我没准呢

[00:02:50] 还加起配合

[00:02:53] 你二老这谁讲配合

[00:02:55] 你先放这先放这先放这靠谱不靠边开啊

[00:03:04] 好了

[00:03:06] 大叔大妈

[00:03:08] 咱们家的这个公斤炸弹是从什么时候开始的

[00:03:12] 接触的时间我也回答不大上来了

[00:03:16] 大家可以登录我的博客

[00:03:19] 3 W 博客

[00:03:20] 白银招标

[00:03:21] Do com

[00:03:25] 大高都有自个儿的博特了

[00:03:27] 哎

[00:03:27] 名人嘛

[00:03:28] 都特不哎

[00:03:32] 大叔啊

[00:03:33] 您仔细回忆一下

[00:03:35] 这个公鸡下蛋之前有什么征兆

[00:03:38] 没啥征兆

[00:03:40] 这是不可能的当时

[00:03:50] 心里头特别的矛盾

[00:03:55] 特别的压抑啊

[00:03:58] 你想啊

[00:04:00] 你细想

[00:04:01] 一只公鸡

[00:04:04] 他要下蛋

[00:04:06] 不是他的活

[00:04:07] 他要干

[00:04:11] 丢不丢人

[00:04:13] 丢不丢鸡

[00:04:15] 同行们会怎么看他

[00:04:18] 心里怎么看他

[00:04:19] 鸭子怎么看他

[00:04:21] 大鹅怎么看他

[00:04:22] 今后在文艺界怎么混界

[00:04:28] 你说是在第一届

[00:04:30] 不在第一届家主界

[00:04:32] 家怎么混呢

[00:04:34] 道过去跟他好过这些小母亲他不伤心

[00:04:40] 而且他当公鸡的时候惨蛋付出

[00:04:44] 那些鸡仔们都长大了

[00:04:46] 怎么称呼他

[00:04:48] 叫爸不是了

[00:04:50] 那妈也不是

[00:04:51] 那爸你正的

[00:04:54] 但是有大的

[00:04:56] 不能不下

[00:04:58] 不下和接着你

[00:05:04] 似乎你是乎他坚定了一个信念

[00:05:07] 下自己的道

[00:05:08] 让别人说去了

[00:05:14] 我悲剧

[00:05:16] 他就是憋不住住戴着憋

[00:05:19] 他不能跳

[00:05:20] 大叔

[00:05:21] 他把这袋放在哪了

[00:05:23] 上哪了

[00:05:24] 亲哪

[00:05:24] 那你该下哪了啊

[00:05:28] 他下哪了呢

[00:05:30] 嗯

[00:05:31] 他当时他就他响了

[00:05:33] 嗯

[00:05:36] 上哪去家家

[00:05:42] 他就溜达

[00:05:43] 他就边溜达边想来到了鸡窝面前没好意思下

[00:05:51] 他又溜达

[00:05:52] 那咋溜来到了压架面前也没好意思下

[00:06:02] 站长呀

[00:06:03] 我回

[00:06:04] 下不行了

[00:06:05] 憋不住了

[00:06:07] 万一掉下来就全漏了

[00:06:10] 呛哪啊

[00:06:11] 哎

[00:06:11] 最后你说上哪呢

[00:06:13] 你看狗啊

[00:06:20] 那狗啊

[00:06:21] 是那是谁发现的狗崽子吗

[00:06:26] 狗在这一发现

[00:06:27] 第二天全天就鸡鸭我走猫都知道了

[00:06:34] 俺们家那只鸡一夜之间就成了名鸡了

[00:06:39] 那家伙过去俺家那只鸡走到那是挺胸抬头

[00:06:43] 气宇轩昂

[00:06:45] 咔咔自打下了这公鸡蛋走道变样的

[00:06:51] 变这样式的了

[00:06:55] 哎呀

[00:06:56] 我手子搁地上

[00:06:58] 这划拉啥呢

[00:06:59] 仔细一看明白了

[00:07:00] 练签名呢

[00:07:07] 说的太好了

[00:07:08] 太精彩了

[00:07:09] 大叔

[00:07:10] 公军下的那个蛋现在在哪呢

[00:07:12] 吃个吃了谁吃了

[00:07:17] 我吃的不敢吃

[00:07:20] 你吃了以后是什么反应

[00:07:22] 啥反应没有

[00:07:23] 跟正常蛋一没一样大

[00:07:25] 说您这不配

[00:07:26] 可能哪能那么说啊

[00:07:28] 这这不能够吃普通蛋遇一样

[00:07:30] 你你不能说是包治百病

[00:07:32] 最起码你得有点疗效

[00:07:34] 你我这个你你俩什么你知

[00:07:44] 许多老年人被脑血症后遗症所困扰

[00:07:48] 我老伴儿去年得了脑血栓

[00:07:51] 在没吃攻击症之前

[00:07:53] 他走道是这样的

[00:07:54] 你得学个吴老二走道快计的专厨大

[00:08:17] 你是不是人

[00:08:18] 这咋都骗人呢

[00:08:20] 这有是假药

[00:08:21] 这人没害的

[00:08:22] 你说得骗人呢

[00:08:23] 小牛啊

[00:08:24] 回都倒过来不啊

[00:08:26] 没吃饭之前总摔

[00:08:28] 吃完了能走来倒酒

[00:08:32] 我带你瞅袋去啊

[00:08:34] 好好嘞

[00:08:36] 挺好的

[00:08:37] 做的挺好

[00:08:37] 来来

[00:08:39] 我说来喝点酒

[00:08:41] 你特反呢

[00:08:43] 是特反是特

[00:08:44] 爸

[00:08:47] 不管撤啥嘛

[00:08:49] 就俺们家啊

[00:08:50] 不打

[00:08:51] 你爸妈成名之后啊

[00:08:53] 第一笔见钱

[00:08:55] 这不就合了

[00:08:56] 行

[00:08:57] 你准备下一步怎么弄呢

[00:08:58] 呃

[00:08:59] 我这炒作吗

[00:09:00] 把这个鸡买断

[00:09:02] 爸

[00:09:02] 来

[00:09:02] 我赶紧上去

[00:09:05] 大草

[00:09:06] 你要炒作呀

[00:09:07] 以后多找点人啊

[00:09:08] 上教阳台

[00:09:09] 像白岩松啊

[00:09:10] 挺有缘的

[00:09:11] 去证明人找的

[00:09:12] 嗯

[00:09:13] 要不然你白吹

[00:09:17] 大叔

[00:09:19] 麻烦您把那个鸡抱出来

[00:09:24] 我跟你说

[00:09:25] 那个鸡看完了之后

[00:09:27] 你行

[00:09:33] 咱抓紧时间把那个合同了

[00:09:34] 这该签合同

[00:09:35] 好吧

[00:09:36] 还好

[00:09:36] 那这样啊

[00:09:38] 这2万块钱我就是买钻就积了

[00:09:40] 对的2万

[00:09:42] 行在这签签有

[00:09:44] 您看一下啊

[00:09:45] 如果您要是违约了

[00:09:47] 您得双倍返还

[00:09:48] 您得给我4万

[00:09:49] 双倍十倍

[00:09:50] 我给你20 万能够让你抱走

[00:09:53] 要不然我跟干妈合作得痛快

[00:09:56] 对了

[00:09:57] 大妈

[00:09:58] 还有一个麻烦

[00:09:59] 您还得做一个大量东西的形象代言广告

[00:10:03] 广告词赶紧录上好了

[00:10:05] 这前当手太极

[00:10:08] 那咱们开始

[00:10:09] 好词啊

[00:10:10] 很简洁

[00:10:11] 很靠谱

[00:10:14] 下蛋公鸡公鸡中的三斗鸡耶

[00:10:19] 再来

[00:10:20] 下面我们讲一些实验啊

[00:10:23] 下蛋公鸡公鸡公鸡三道鸡

[00:10:26] 哦耶

[00:10:27] 再来个下蛋公题呀

[00:10:31] 我这录广告

[00:10:32] 你别赶紧给人爆鸡子

[00:10:34] 我合同都签了做

[00:10:36] 你说来干啥呀

[00:10:38] 这人怎么那么磨叽

[00:10:39] 你吃合同啊

[00:10:40] 签呢

[00:10:42] 你那么着急啥呀

[00:10:43] 怎么的

[00:10:43] 完了鸡没了

[00:10:45] 儿媳妇给炖了青菜

[00:10:46] 就是老伴老伴哎

[00:10:55] 老伴老伴老伴

[00:10:58] 白云呐白云

[00:11:00] 小云呐小云

[00:11:01] 哎

[00:11:03] 看我

[00:11:05] 我介绍

[00:11:15] 别上火啊

[00:11:16] 老头在这呢啊那个你看我眼色行势好不长

[00:11:20] 看你主啊

[00:11:22] 别哭了啊啊看看啊

[00:11:27] 跳着啊

[00:11:29] 那老头呢

[00:11:30] 老头呢

[00:11:30] 还跟你宝贝在着呢啊这呀啊老头贝哎

[00:11:47] 刚才大妈还挺好的

[00:11:49] 这可了完蛋吗

[00:11:51] 你说听说公鸡抱走了

[00:11:53] 心疼了啊

[00:11:55] 拿下来说这没事

[00:11:58] 有感情了

[00:12:00] 哎呀

[00:12:02] 这钱你先收了

[00:12:05] 大叔你可不能开这个玩笑

[00:12:07] 你要违约要退钱就不是退2万了

[00:12:10] 你得装备得4万

[00:12:11] 就他吧

[00:12:18] 打名了

[00:12:20] 你大叔这今咋没报来啊

[00:12:29] 我来了为啥五岁去啊

[00:12:36] 这这鸡呀

[00:12:37] 连下山带打鸣那一个接两样

[00:12:40] 喂

[00:12:40] 你来喝酒了啊

[00:12:42] 啊

[00:12:46] 你说这西医能那么值钱吗

[00:12:48] 你就赔着大叔

[00:12:51] 我实话跟您说吧

[00:12:53] 这个西药搁在您二老手里烤一个籽儿

[00:12:55] 不值不值钱你们交给我了

[00:12:57] 我炒作炒完了

[00:13:01] 这就值钱

[00:13:02] 那要做完了呢

[00:13:06] 那也值钱啊

[00:13:08] 就是这个鸡

[00:13:09] 它是民医

[00:13:11] 无论生到死

[00:13:13] 哪怕吃肉炖了

[00:13:14] 它也是值钱的

[00:13:15] 不会错

[00:13:16] 你太有才了

[00:13:21] 你比方说啊

[00:13:23] 现在就是那鸡鸡吃一块钱多少钱

[00:13:26] 就这一半

[00:13:27] 不给2000块钱

[00:13:29] 没权利吃

[00:13:30] 基金呢

[00:13:32] 四千一肝呢

[00:13:33] 六千一生呢

[00:13:35] 8000够岁数有才呢

[00:13:42] 怎么你说来这个大妈你你也吃不

[00:13:47] 别光我一个人吃啊

[00:13:48] 你说你们吃

[00:13:50] 我这吃不息

[00:13:56] 大哥这都吃啊

[00:13:57] 哎呦

[00:13:58] 不能再喝了

[00:13:59] 你无论如何呀

[00:14:00] 一会儿你得

[00:14:01] 才让我呀

[00:14:02] 把这鸡抱走

[00:14:03] 抱你是抱不走了啊

[00:14:04] 你可以端走

[00:14:08] 端走

[00:14:09] 这个实话告诉你吧啊

[00:14:11] 你要的那只鸡让儿媳妇炖了吃的就是

[00:14:14] 不过你按照你的要求做法不一样

[00:14:17] 你说的是草

[00:14:18] 但是我们是炖的价

[00:14:20] 天呢

[00:14:21] 你都定完了啊

[00:14:22] 情况就是这么个情况

[00:14:24] 2万块钱呢

[00:14:25] 你要留就留下

[00:14:26] 不留你就拿走

[00:14:27] 你愿意吃2万大餐你都端走啊

[00:14:30] 一块没动

[00:14:31] 你看咋样

[00:14:43] 大叔大妈您别动

[00:14:45] 配合一下

[00:14:46] 我不能把这鸡砸到手里头

[00:14:50] 人一上火就容易缺心眼

[00:14:53] 过去我一直血

[00:14:56] 自从吃了这下蛋东西的肉

[00:14:59] 哎

[00:14:59] 就变得机灵了

[00:15:00] 吃一块肉

[00:15:01] 才2万块钱

[00:15:02] 真值

[00:15:03] 真的是太有才了