《The Simple Plot of Metal Gear Solid(Explicit)》歌词

[00:00:00] The Simple Plot of Metal Gear Solid - Starbomb

[00:00:00] Composed by：Arin Joseph Hanson/Brian Alexander Wecht/Leigh Daniel Avidan

[00:00:00] Hello and welcome back to another episode of talking video games

[00:00:06] We continue today in our series of games with simple plots

[00:00:09] Guests please introduce yourselves

[00:00:10] And tell us the plots of your games

[00:00:12] I'm de chef from burger time I make-a de burgers

[00:00:17] Hello I'm Centipede

[00:00:18] I just kinda move down the screen

[00:00:21] Hey I'm Snake from Metal Gear Solid

[00:00:23] My game's got a pretty simple story

[00:00:25] Snake I don't see your name on the list

[00:00:27] Ah my friend Cloud Strife told me to

[00:00:28] Come on this show and talk about it

[00:00:30] Oh God no

[00:00:31] It was the distant future two thousand and five

[00:00:33] All I wanted to do was chill out and retire

[00:00:35] But genetically enhanced renegades named hoxhound

[00:00:37] Stole a bunch of nukes and had s**t on lockdown

[00:00:38] Okay we're past our time limit Snake

[00:00:40] Colonel Campbell said I had to infiltrate

[00:00:42] Before they start a nuclear conflict

[00:00:44] What a bunch of jerks

[00:00:45] You're a bag of dicks

[00:00:45] I climbed through an air vent and saved two guys

[00:00:47] They shared top secrets and suddenly died

[00:00:49] Of two heart attacks right out of thin air

[00:00:50] All within five minutes

[00:00:51] Oh my god I don't care

[00:00:52] Then I met Meryl

[00:00:53] A hot box of rocks

[00:00:54] And I fought a gunslinger named Ocelot

[00:00:56] But a cyborg ninja cut his hand away

[00:00:57] You know normal s**t that happens every day

[00:00:59] Listen Snake there must've been a mistake

[00:01:02] On this show you've got

[00:01:03] To get right to the point of the game

[00:01:05] Like the ship from Galaga

[00:01:07] Hi I shoot stuff in space

[00:01:09] And this car from Pole Position

[00:01:11] I'm a car

[00:01:11] That's great

[00:01:12] You know we've been through

[00:01:13] This before with your boy Cloud Strife

[00:01:16] And he talked so long

[00:01:17] I contemplated ending my life

[00:01:19] So let's keep things nice and

[00:01:21] Simple like the hero over there

[00:01:23] From the Atari game Adventure

[00:01:24] I'm literally just a yellow square

[00:01:26] Who cares

[00:01:26] I tried really hard to find a mech named Rex

[00:01:28] And the ninja came back in the mix like Chex

[00:01:30] It was Gray Fox and I fought Vulcan Raven

[00:01:32] A big motherf**kin' Alaskan shaman

[00:01:33] So I killed that guy but before he died

[00:01:35] He said Meryl liked me I almost cried

[00:01:37] She's a little hottie pants ooh-meow

[00:01:39] It would be so great if you died right now

[00:01:40] I killed Sniper Wolf who was absurdly hot

[00:01:42] And then murdered three guys and an evil robot

[00:01:43] 'Til Liquid Snake and I were left alone

[00:01:45] He said that I was his brother and a superior clone

[00:01:47] Then he died of a virus and thinking fast

[00:01:49] Meryl saved us

[00:01:49] I don't give a frog's fat a*s

[00:01:50] Then when stayed together until the seven year itch

[00:01:52] And now you know the simple plot of Metal Gear b***h

[00:01:54] Listen Snake I've taken all I can take

[00:01:57] Just because a game is simple doesn't mean that it's lame

[00:02:00] Tell the kid from Paperboy

[00:02:02] Yo I deliver those papes

[00:02:04] The guy from Elevator Action

[00:02:06] Uh elevators

[00:02:07] Okay

[00:02:07] Dear God

[00:02:08] Why can't I just have a single panel of guests

[00:02:11] Who can say their plots in forty f**kin' minutes or less

[00:02:14] Now just watch me Snake

[00:02:15] Before you make me reach for my gun

[00:02:17] I'll summarize your game and show you

[00:02:19] How this s**t is really motherf**kin' done

[00:02:27] How it's motherf**kin' done

[00:02:35] You sneak around and save the world the end

[00:02:38] My god can I get a replacement

[00:02:39] Guest with a simple plot please

[00:02:41] Hi I'm Sora from Kingdom Hearts

[00:02:43] Noo